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Auntie Prism
(stardust savant)
02/18/11 09:14 AM
Fuck You Sylvanelf (01/02—06/02) [re: ] Reply to this post

Tensions are running high in Coffee Shop after pianocraft rebukes Sylvanelf's cynical comments on a 'hello' thread. Soon everyone joins in the verbal sparring, and the thread closes with an extended cross-examination of JonnyManic's alleged intellectual and sexual prowess at university. Watch out for special guest appearances by Adler_84 (later T J Newton) and BoES (anonymous).

(Some relevant subject lines appear in square brackets after the poster's name.)


***

pianocraft: Read this asshole's post here

I welcomed someone to this message board that we actually respect and sylvanass replies with a desperate plea for attention.

Well, the only attention you're gonna get is to point out what a worthless, ignorant dumbass you are.

I say it again: Go Fuck Yourself, asswipe.

twister: [Thank You, Sylvanelf]: I don't know how to tell you this, pianocraft, but Sylvanelf was quite right. TallinTheDark does think you're ugly. I even have a quote to prove it:

"I think pianocraft is ugly" - TallinTheDark

Don't slander innocent posters like Sylvanefl when you don't know the facts, Mr. Craft.

pianocraft Twister, I do know how to tell you this:

You're a liar.

twister: [Telling Lies]:

In reply to:

You're a liar


Not eating meat on one occasion does not make one a vegatarian.

pianocraft: No, but you're still a liar.

WildWind: [Must be a slow week]: Quit trying to shit-stir, pianocraft

pianocraft: {double posted} If you think I started this, WW, your reading comprehension is not as great as you think it is.

RocknRoll_Rebel: I think PianoCraft is trying to get outta this without getting laughed at

{sig:} I post, therefor, i am.

pianocraft: If you want to avoid some laughter, you might want to check the spelling on the word "therefor."

elvenlass: Make fun of me! Make fun of me!
Oh, come on, can't you say something mean about me?

Cisite: I see that Sylvanelf is yet to comment on this pointless thread.

moonspyke: [U.G.L.Y.]: Someone is always going to think you are ugly pianocraft, just like everybody else in the whole damn world.

Even if it is Tallinthedark!

(by the way...he told me too)

pianocraft: The issue is not whether I'm ugly or not.

The point is, why would sylvanass post an unprovoked insult on a thread where I welcome a new member?

sylvanwipe is a fucking asshole.

Anonymous: The point is your wasting our time with this bickering about this stupid fued you think you have with this dude who insulted you. Let it go, no one really cares.

Tyler:

In reply to:

No, but you're still a liar.


And you are still a shithead

Coldfyr: jeez.. for a piano, you sure are thin-skinned.. lighten up! Sylvanelf is cool :)

cracked: Pianocraft, ugly? No, just stupid!

Coan_teen: [PLEASE!]: Oh, for crying out loud. I hate coming back to crap like this. I just spent a fabulous weekend at a retreat, and this is the thread I see at the top of the hot topics.

Pianocraft, get a life. Sylvanelf (as far as I can tell) was attempting to be funny. Would have probably pulled it off if you weren't so sensitive. Get over yourself. How many times have I told someone that on these boards? Too many, I'm sure.

No one wants to read you trashing one of the favored posters here. And don't hide your profile.

Atonalexpress: Perhaps the real problem is that pianocraft needs to hear some really good piano compositions! So that the feud with the Elf will be history!

Coldfyr: are you saying he needs to get his ivories tickled?

Atonalexpress: That would be a problem for you, Coldfyr! It is much easier than that; all he needs to do is download some music on the site you created for me!

Goblin Queen: I think I'll stay out of this one - I'm not here to make enemies

Coldfyr: it certainly would be a problem for me, considering I play Cello, not pianos.
He should listen to your music.

SillyBoyBlue: [Sylvanelf isn't funny all the same]: I like pianocraft and I like Sylvanelf dont fight. However, pianocraft should've dealt with this issue privately if it really bugged her

Littlerockstar: Poor Pianocraft. There's no reason to gang up on the guy. I mean, I certainly don't give a rip about his feelings regarding Sylvanelf, but just to mix it up a little, I'm gonna side with this Pianocraft fellow. Why not?

Mondo: [You're not alone]: TallinTheDark thinks I'm ugly, too.

Ruskie: [Love]: Settle down here children, there's no reason to get upset.

Pianocraft, no one thinks you're ugly, we are all God's special people and we're all beautiful in the name of the Lord, our Saviour.

Now go repent.

Sylvanelf: [PianoCraft is a doodie-head.]: That's right, a big doodie-head.

Remade/Remodeled: [Booya!]:

In reply to:

PianoCraft is a doodie-head.


By my count, that makes it:
Sylvanelf: 2
pianocraft: 0

pianocraft: All of you are wrong for siding with sylvanwipe. There is nothing friendly or funny about an unprovoked insult on what was meant to be a welcoming thread.

I guess IQ's have suddenly lowered around here.

Remade/Remodeled: [Hmm…]:

In reply to:

There is nothing... funny about an unprovoked insult


Yes there is

JonnyManic: He is right actually, there is lots of fun to be had from unprovoked attacks. I remember a few months back, for some strange reason, I had a go at Sylvanelf for calling someone gay or something. Then he and Remade/Remodeled (boyfriends you see) had a go at me (the premise was very poor, making a point that I had missed out an apostrophe, rather than classic mother-baiting). Then again, I was a bit uptight at that point, so let random abuse run free...

moonspyke: [ Go syl!]: JERRY JERRY

Remade/Remodeled: [The Art of Being PC]:

In reply to:

Then he and Remade/Remodeled (boyfriends you see)


We prefer to be called Same Sex Life Partners, thank you very much.

Starbuck: [always the last to know!]: is it tacky of me to bring this post back to life? sorry if it is...but i just now found it via the link provided by Mr. Elf himself. very fun posting. wow, amazing what i missed when i was home over the christmas and new year's holidays! Starbuck

BoES (Anonymous): [This post is worse then most I've encountered...]: "Let's make pianocraft feel like shit and then go masturbate in a corner!"

Jesus Christ people...
Sylvanelf was obviously in the wrong.
Sylvanelf is obviosly an idiot... and here's some proof:

In the post trashing me, I said something like: If someone made a post titled "sylvanelf" and basically tried to get him kicked off the forum and called him perverted and an idiot, etc... he wouldn't act very civil himself.

He dug around for a while (seems like quite a while considering how old the thread was) and came up with this attrocity of a post, comparing his reactions to my own reactions regarding the two posts, respectively...

The two are not comparable. For the following reasons:

1. In the post trashing me, basically everyone trashed me (until near the end when people started to come around - thanks by the way, those of you who did)...
2. I didn't personally attack anyone for no reason - People were doing that to me....
3. My original response to the thread wasn't a negative one. It wasn't until people continued to insult me for no reason that I began reacting badly (jee, I wonder why)

Finally,
I like pianocraft because he\she is obviously a more decent person than most of you and actually exercises his\her morals from time to time...
Don't let the thick layers of crud and shit discourage you, pianocraft, they bothered me for a while but I got over it and realised that not all people who post on this forum are cunts.

schizophrenic: Although I would use this opportunity to take a cheap shot at Tallin, I won't. I will say this though: STOP ARGUING AMONGST YOURSELVES AND GET A LIFE! I MEAN COME ON! THIS POST IS 5 GODDAMN PAGES LONG! GIVE IT A REST!

Starbuck: first off, its a thread, not just one post.

second, its only 4 pages long, although, this may make it five! Starbuck

Sylvanelf: [BoES is more boring then most I've encountered...]: Why did you even post on this thread BoES? I mean, you had your very OWN hate thread! Don't you feel special? Maybe your mommy was right. Anyway, I thought the arguement was over? You said so yourself.

In reply to:

He dug around for a while (seems like quite a while considering how old the thread was)


Actually, I thought of this thread right away, and gave a link to it.

Now go eat some mushrooms. Yum, mushrooms....

Adler_84: Another senseless thread…

stardustdb: Adler_84, I agree!

Remade/Remodeled: [How did I miss this at the time?]:

In reply to:

rather than classic mother-baiting


Oh, we can't all be highly educated, witty, university 'graduates' like yourself, Manic.

In reply to:

so let random abuse run free...


OK, fucker.

SugarPlumFairy: I think this is a fun thread - but only because I don't understand it at all, and I like absurd things.

Remade/Remodeled: [Summarize, Summarset]: I'll lay it down for you, old skool:

Main Themes of This Thread:

1.) Pianocraft has fun being anal and we love him for it.
2.) Sylvanelf and I have made a mutual bond of love and commitment towards each other and are intending to spend the rest of our lives as a happily homosexual couple.
3.) Manic claims to have several 'degrees' from a reputable 'university' yet A) Can't spell his own name, B) Does not know how to use an apostrophe and C) Could not have had enough time to complete any courses if he really is having sexual relations with my mother as much as he claims.
4.) Random/unprovoked insults are at once fun, clever and quality entertainment for all who witness them.


There... although, now you understand, it's a lot less fun, innit?

Starbuck: oh shit, R/R, im in tears and my head hurts from all the laughing i just did over that post!!!! esp what you said about manic!!! damn, making fun of people is indeed good fun!!! someone insult me :) starbuck, ps, nice subject too!

JonnyManic: [How to be as good as me…]:

In reply to:

Manic claims to have several 'degrees' from a reputable 'university' yet A) Can't spell his own name, B) Does not know how to use an apostrophe and C) Could not have had enough time to complete any courses if he really is having sexual relations with my mother as much as he claims


Pah! I have one degree, "BScEcon (Hons) in International Politics with Intelligence Studies". Any other qualifications I have are in "A-Level" or "GCSE". Tut tut.

A) We've been through this before
B) Well, when I'm sober I'm a master..
C) True, I don't drill her as often as I claim, but that's just because sometimes your Dad launches a sneak attack as I enter the house.

As an aside, I got my degree with no revision, less than 10% attendance at lectures over 3 years and with huge amounts of drugs in my blood. Oh, and lots of pussy too. Viva me!

Halloween Jill: I heart this thread. I heart you all.

Remade/Remodeled: [Don't Do as Jonny Don't Does]:

In reply to:

Oh, and lots of pussy too.


Come on, my mother isn't that fat.

That's kinda interesting, you behaved like an arts student yet you got the degree in econbloodyomics...


It's sad that you were so cool then, but now you're just a washed up old intellectual, forced to fly out to a large 43 year old woman in New Zealand in the hope of getting laid.

dukewhite: [Kiss and make up yet?]: Just sort of wondering, seeing as this thread began over six months ago...have you two made up yet, Sylvanelf and Pianocraft or is this feud still as thriving as the thread?

Anonymous: [re: Remade/Remodeled]: What does your homosexuality have to do with any of this??
It just makes a fuckwit like me all the more confused..

twister: [ Me, Jonny and a dozen horses nail her all at once]:

In reply to:

Come on, my mother isn't that fat.


You're fooling no-one, bitch.

Sylvanelf:

In reply to:

have you two made up yet, Sylvanelf and Pianocraft or is this feud still as thriving as the thread?


I kick his ass everyday on the playground.

In reply to:

Oh, and lots of pussy too.


The ones that brag about it are the ones not getting it, you make yourself sound like a loser Johnny. Bah, like it's a prize or something anyway

ThePlasticSoul: [The truth]: lets not bicker and argue with one another...we all know this is Milhouse's fault!

Starbuck: ditto jill. this is perhaps the best thread ever made here at tw....well, i have to say that the sex in the city thread was fun for a while, but it just got too serious...this one is still childish with lots of mudslinging!!! and manic is just all around plain fun to point and laugh at!!!! i wonder, he has still failed to say where he got this "so called" degree from. and when were you in school? cause last i checked, most colleges now have an attendence policy, but thats only been in the last 5 years or so, so you must be old and pathetic now, or just lying about everything (can both be true?) starbuck

ps, since this thread is popular, i must recommend to everyone that they check out SPF's post about that LOTR spoof site...ITS HYSTERICAL!

huphelmeyer: Darkness falls across the land
The midnite hour is close at hand
Creatures crawl in search of blood
To terrorize y'awl's neighbourhood
And whosoever shall be found
Without the soul for getting down
Must stand and face the hounds of hell
And rot inside a corpse's shell
The foulest stench is in the air
The funk of forty thousand years
And grizzy ghouls from every tomb
Are closing in to seal your doom
And though you fight to stay alive
Your body starts to shiver
For no mere mortal can resist
The evil of the thriler

Rap performed by Vincent Price for Michael Jackson's Thriller

huphelmeyer: oh yeah, I meant to say that this isn't really a good place to have an argument

JonnyManic: [Starbuck smells of jism and looks like a man]:

In reply to:

and manic is just all around plain fun to point and laugh at!!!!


Yeah, when you're too thick to understand what I'm talking about I guess laughing is the natural reaction.

In reply to:

i wonder, he has still failed to say where he got this "so called" degree from. and when were you in school? cause last i checked, most colleges now have an attendence policy, but thats only been in the last 5 years or so, so you must be old and pathetic now, or just lying about everything (can both be true?)


University of Wales, Aberystwyth. 1998-2001. I'm sure if you follow your odd new obsession with me further you could confirm this. I'm aware I have a somewhat magnetic personality but this is just beyond...

There are attendance requirements for seminars but not for lectures. I rarely went to lectures since (A) I couldn't be fucked, and (B) I'm really fucking clever and didn't need to go.

Old, pathetic, lying? Have you not been getting enough attention?

In reply to:

i must recommend to everyone that they check out SPF's post about that LOTR spoof site...ITS HYSTERICAL!


This explains so much...

EDIT:

In reply to:

Sylvanelf whinging


Muahahahaha! Actually I wasn't trying to brag, rather I was making a humourous aside about the ease with which I achieved my degree. Yet more good natured sparring with R/R. I offer my unreserved apologies to both yourself and women around the world who resent being referred to as "pussy".

"Oh, and lots of cunt too!"

Sylvanelf:

In reply to:

I wasn't trying to brag, rather I was making a humourous aside about the ease with which I achieved my degree.


Oh yes, quite funny too. Well done.

twister: [re: JonnyManic] ["Humourous?"]:

In reply to:

a humourous aside


You're fooling no-one, bitch.

JonnyManic: [sour…]:
ooh, bitter lemons?

Silverstar: i cant believe this thread is still active!!! why are you all still here?! go home!

honestly do you people have nothing better to do than sit in front of your computers and bicker?

wait...don't answer that one...

ziggywombat: [what better things?]:

In reply to:

honestly do you people have nothing better to do than sit in front of your computers and bicker?


umm... not really, no.

um, if you're taking this seriously you're a bigger moron than anyone on this thread. even that manic fellow. you heard me.

JonnyManic: [but, seriously]:

In reply to:

if you're taking this seriously you're a bigger moron than anyone on this thread. even that manic fellow. you heard me.


Since you're not taking this thread seriously, you obviously don't really think I'm a moron. Which is nice...

ziggywombat: [when am I ever serious?]: nah, i just really like calling people morons. it's great, you should try it sometime. moron moron moron....

i'm not making a terribly strong case for my own non-moron-ness am i? ah well at least i can spell it. *thanks god for the spell checker*

Keikat25: Ahem. If the two of you absolutely MUST bash each other, then please send private letters to each other. Of course, if your intention is public humiliation and an attempt at rallying supporters to your cause, then you are doing a very good job, at least on the first one, although I'm not sure who has become more of a laughingstock, the person making the attack, or the one being attacked.
I will say again, please do not attempt to degrade each other, at least not publicly. You make as much of a fool out of yourself as out of him.

dukewhite: Aw, now what's the fun of arguing when no one can hear you? Ever heard of making a scene just for the sake of doing so? This is a bit of a different situation, though, because no one is really taking this thread seriously now (or ever) so try not to be too put off by anyone's insults. It's all in good fun.

Anonymous: I am sorry for being a fucker, myself, about a mo. ago but I don't know if it was towards any of you. I had a hormone imbalance, it turns out AND an arsehole for a boss, to boot. Please accept my sincerest apologies.

Is Sylvanelf one person or a bunch of people? I think it's the same person replying to himself.

Bambi: Conversation Piece:

Intelligent discussion in moderated forums. Come experience a little Conversation Piece.

Starbuck: [re: JonnyManic]: one of two of these is true:

1) you poked a whole lot of random, ugly girls drunk off Dark Eyes...not worth bragging about

2) you are lying cause you think the above statement is worth bragging about...which is pathetic to say the least

one of the following is true:

1) you really did excell at university, but now lead a totally worthless life and your only excitement comes through these random tangents on TW

2) you are a not so clever creation of another TWer, maybe like Monkeyboy 7.0 (nah, thats not true, that would not be an improvement of an earlier edition)

3) you are a wanker that now works for the psychic network, but you arent really a psychic and you dont realize that twister is prolly gonna kick your ass behind the school at recess.

one of the following is true:

1) i look like a man and smell like jiz

2) im perfectly adorable and get plenty of action, but im not pathetic enough to feel the need to brag about it to a bunch of silly message board visitors.

i guess me liking that site is absurd, i mean, its funny, lighthearted, and even witty...none of which you would have any interest in...dont you have TW moms you should be fucking? really, with your busy mommahumping schedule, its amazing that you have time for us silly kids at TW.

dukewhite: Great post, Starbuck. I am getting funny looks from my co-workers for laughing hysterically at apparently nothing. I am having them all read this thread now to understand. (I doubt they will)

Silverstar: of COURSE im not taking it seriously! sheesh, what do you take me for? lol

although if i SHOULD be taking it seriously there is cause for alarm. its not healthy to still be mudslinging after all this time if you really mean it

Remade/Remodeled: [I will never leave the house again]:
… ... if this is what happens on this thread when I go out and enjoy a quiet night of cheap alcohol and magic mushrooms.

Firstly, my 'attacks' on Manic are all A) without malice and B) absolutely groundless, as I'm sure his are towards me.

Because, let's face it, my mother is hideous.

I have no doubts that Manic has a real political science degree, gained from a real university... his comments earlier this year regarding the Arab - Isreali conflict suggested that he was a tad more clued up about comparitive political science than your average Joe Shmoe.

In short, Manic really is a great fellow, especially given the fact that he is Welsh and that he has a degree in economics.

In reply to:

honestly do you people have nothing better to do than sit in front of your computers and bicker?


Of course we do... we sit in front of our computers, bickering and laughing at those pathetic people who have nothing to do other than sitting in front of their computers chastising others for doing nothing other than sitting in front of their computers bickering.

Lastly, smelling like jiz and looking like a man aren't particularly bad attributes... hell, I'm proud to belong to both of those groups.

Starbuck: once again, this has to be the best thread in a long time!!! being mean to eachother in jest is really tops! we should all insult eachother more often, gets out all the bad thoughts without really hurting anyone...because im still assuming that everyone takes this as a joke the way i do...if not, i apoligize, and i also recommend that you purcase a sense of humor :) starbuck

JonnyManic: [The completed questionnaire]:

In reply to:

1) you poked a whole lot of random, ugly girls drunk off Dark Eyes...not worth bragging about

2) you are lying cause you think the above statement is worth bragging about...which is pathetic to say the least


It's a sort of grey area in between. My "bragging" I must reitterate was light hearted. But somewhat truthful.

In reply to:

1) you really did excell at university, but now lead a totally worthless life and your only excitement comes through these random tangents on TW

2) you are a not so clever creation of another TWer, maybe like Monkeyboy 7.0 (nah, thats not true, that would not be an improvement of an earlier edition)

3) you are a wanker that now works for the psychic network, but you arent really a psychic and you dont realize that twister is prolly gonna kick your ass behind the school at recess


The first one has a ring of truth to it. Though I do have other interests at the moment, it's all mainly worthless. Until September when I begin my career corrupting youths as a teacher... The twister kicking my arse scenario has given me a good old chuckle though. Bravo!

In reply to:

1) i look like a man and smell like jiz

2) im perfectly adorable and get plenty of action, but im not pathetic enough to feel the need to brag about it to a bunch of silly message board visitors.


Definitely number one. Sorry.

but really, that Lord Of The Rings parody is even less funny than Friends.

dukewhite:

In reply to:

but really, that Lord Of The Rings parody is even less funny than Friends.


Hey, I happen to like BOTH Friends and the LOTR parody. I know i am not alone in this.

Halloween Jill: [out of control]: Don't worry, Jonny. I got your back.

Starbuck: [jerry's bodyguards couldnt stop me!]: thats it bitch, its on! I'M gonna kick your ass behind the school! Starbuck

JonnyManic: [goodness…]:

In reply to:

Hey, I happen to like BOTH Friends and the LOTR parody. I know i am not alone in this.


True, I'm sure that all the other inmates at your "Home for the Mentally Challenged" are with you on this.

R/R, Haloween Jill: I am touched. I'm even refraining from any touched/parents cracks here.

I really wouldn't be setting a good example if I fought outside the school...

Rather than words comes the thought of high windows


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