That then is your greatest failure. You have no reason to develop and evolve.

KArt | Project Michelangelo | LiveJournal

If I was still at school, a critique might, indeed, be helpful, but I'm not, and I'm self-assured about my writing. Works of art aren't the product of asking people where you're going wrong. Those are works of entertainment, tailored to suit an audience, prior to an individual.

Tell us more about your revolution, poet. What's it called? Can a fellow artist join in?

"The time is sublime and the moon is so right"

Moo!

Everyone is welcome. I'd prefer to go into depth when the time is right, later this year. It's an artistic revolution, carrying a priority to address assorted injustice characterising how artistry is conveyed. That's, more or less, all I can say at this juncture.

In reply to:

---

I'm not whining. I'm relaxed enough, making observations. It's impossible to improve upon my poetry, given I'm satisfied with it.

---

Please please please stop trying to sound all smart and scholarly. It's killing me...it just makes you sound stupider and stupider. If you want to "fit in" in these forums or whatever the hell you're trying to do, I suggest loosening your ass. People really like to associate with others that will show emotions and laugh with them and generally jump into the crowd to have fun. However, you're trying to be all untouchable so...if your goal is to try and make friends here, that's not exactly the best method.

BEEF! It's what's for dinner!
This summer the Transylvanians take Manhattan
http://nyrockycon.com/main.asp

You seem to be confusing sincerity with pretension. I disagree with your theory, as you can never have a face in a crowd. I'm looking to make connections with likeminded people. If I change the manner in which I write as you suggest, such a connection would be void.

Why d'you use eleven syllables per line?
Is that the only way you can make it rhyme?

You tink anyone 'ere gives a feck about your mother-revvo-fuking-lution?

A thing of beauty is a joy for ever

You, obviously, care somewhat, seeing as you're replying to this thread.

M!