This one is a cautionary tale as well as a bit of lighthearted fun...

The Saucy Maid

Long ago there lived a maid,
Whose dreams were lewd in thought,
She'd smile and wink at all the men,
She'd tease, but not be caught.

For the saucy maid had other plans,
She'd land a husband rich,
And when she'd taken all he had,
She'd leave him in a ditch.

Now it chanced that in that very town,
There lived an aging fool,
A man whose gold surpassed the stars,
But stubborn as a mule.

The saucy maid did plot and plan,
And slowly bide her time,
"For once he's had a taste of me,
What's his shall all be mine!"

She slipped into her finest dress,
She pulled her neckline low,
For once the old fool looked within,
He'd surely sell his soul.

She swayed upto the old fools house,
Her lips were full and ripe,
Her skin was soft as buttermilk,
Her hair was blonde and bright.

She knocked upon his door three times,
And struck her sausiest pose,
She smiled until her teeth shone white,
She flashed her legs and hose.

But when the door did open,
She screamed and yelled in fright,
For all her cunning she'd not seen this,
The fool did have a wife.

With a roar of bestial rage,
The wife did heft her broom,
Her arms were large as slabs of beef,
Her face was like a bulls.

The maiden shrieked and turned and fled,
The wife did swing her broom,
She yelped as bristles stung her head,
She ran but she was doomed.

The wife tore at her flimsy dress,
It ripped across it's length,
And naked now did the run the maid,
And run with all her strength.

How the men did cheer to see,
The maiden running wild,
They laughed to see a sight so strange,
A maid chased by a wife.

And so my friends our story ends,
As all good stories do,
The maid had learned her lesson well,
Her wicked days were through.

From that day forth she changed her ways,
A saucy maid no more,
For the wife soon had her well in hand,
And set to scrubbing floors.

PORK SCRATCHINGS!!! Art thou insane? Myspace.

For some reason, I want to sing this poem to the tune of "Found a Job" by the Talking Heads.

meow

"Love is like a cup of tea."

Love is like a cup of tea,
That helps to warm your heart,
It's hot and strong and fills you up,
And aches when you're apart.

But don't be fooled by what you taste,
For love can have a bite,
A too hot cup can burn your mouth,
And turn your love to spite.

But though I have been hurt before,
I know you won't burn me.
So come and laugh and hold my hand,
Lets share a cup of tea...


PORK SCRATCHINGS!!! Art thou insane? Myspace.

I love The Dancer, Percy. The rhyme scheme sounds great, very consistent, and it flows really nicely. Besides that, you've worked it so that the most impactful line falls last in each alternating stanza (before the "chorus," if you will), to great effect.

This one is kind of personal, as poetry often is, but especially so, in this case. I'm kind of embarrassed to post something like this, but I feel it's one of my better pieces, so what the hey...


Keys


Someone once gave me
A black and white row
Of doorways to melody
Chairs to the soul
The keys, with no map

Nothing to choose to ignore

I used it, back then
In spite of my wanting
Something much greater
The things you can't hold
The chords you can't strike
With a thousand small fingers

For her, all I wish was a thing he could give
With a pure, unselfish, and thoughtful motive
That protects much more than a name

And obliges connections that aren't just in vein


I still use the gift
That was handed to me
On the day after Christmas
A black and white summons
To court
Where his honor won't cast any judgements
Won't throw down a stone or a gem from his mind
Where he's seated on high
More a child, than I

Where I'm held in contempt
I'm mired in silence
Silence, still being
The one thing he orders
For, he gave me the gift to make beautiful music
Then, died on the first beat my heart was infused with

I still use his gift
In spite of now wanting
To show him the evils I've deeded his name
To return every moment
Of lonely self-doubt
The gift of regret
And of longing and shame

To use his gift against him


I no longer want
To hold on to this thing

But, it's part of me, now

His music is mine


And, I only know this



From what's been left behind




From a time I'm too young to remember

"What I learned from the future is Sharpie markers will replace facial hair and all men are impotent except Sean Connery. The future looks bright." - T.P. on Zardoz

Avalanche

Time is like an avalanche,
That sweeps away our lives,
Each fresh new flake, a persons fate,
Bound by truth and hope and lies.

And when the snowmelt starts to slip,
The mountain's echo roars,
We cling together in the rush,
And feel our spirits soar.

Perchance the slide will cease to flow,
And give us peace at last,
For all those flakes have lives to lead,
A future and a past...

You sit there in your comfort, you don't believe I'm real. But you cannot buy protection from the way that I feel!

Persilot, this just goes to show that times of happiness can also bear very bright poetic fruits. Well done...


Here's something I wrote in the last five minutes.


My dog is like a piece of furniture
She picks up all the smells around her
This is comforting
Strange
Like me

Your cat is like a cold, black crow
Perched upon the backs of couches
This is alarming
Strange
Like you

"And don't call us Maltesers." - Marquis

I just recorded a cover of Cohen's Hallelujah (so sue me, Buckley) with lyrics of my own:

Be A Lady (Hallelujah)
Us two were known as slightly odd
it took a breakup to find out
that you've been like a bookmark to my story
I thought the sex could use a boost
But other girls have lacked your muse
And I just hoped that you'd become a lady
Be a lady
Be a lady for me

Our lonely hearts dwell in old books
you've read them all and I gave you looks
there's a difference between Plato and his students
Well I may not be as bright as him
but he's not real and I'm all whim
Why can't you grow up for me and be a lady
Be a lady
Be a lady for me

I took a bus and rode to Spain
to see if my hopes were all in vein
I found you like a pilgrim finds his faith
Camino francés twist & bend
And I'm all but an innocent
In my dreams I have seen you as a lady
Be a lady
Be a lady for me

Now caught up in my barren love
I see them stars glide up above
I recall the night we went down to get some romance
The Romans when they built that bridge
Did they imagine us on its ridge
That night I saw that you could be my lady
Be a lady
Be a lady for me

/

and I desperately need help with that first verse where I can't find anything that rhymes with out and has the meaning "odd" or "strange". Help, anyone?

~
Heaven is a place where
Nothing ever happens

I can't think of a word for "odd," but since you talk of faith and whimsy throughout the song, methinks the word "doubt" might be somehow fitting? Although, if and exactly how it is - that's for you to decide.

I normally wouldn't be too keen on the idea of changing the lyrics to a song as sanctifiable as "Hallelujah," but I really like what you've done. When I think about it, I can't relate to the original lyrics very much on a personal level, but these are something everyone can wrap their arms around, I think...


This poem was actually somewhat inspired by the travesty I posted in Monekyboy's poetry forum. You'd think it would be the other way around, but not in this warped ol' noggin...



I'm tearing out each life line
I'm drowning down each drip
I'm tossing back each lifesaver
I thought
Held me adrift

I'll kick at palm-warmed emeralds
I'll kick, to sink or swim
I'm quick to slink below the waves
And, see all
That's hidden

The water kept me starkly numb
The water had been bobbing
With fingers, blue, clinging to you;
With dead
And foreign bodies

I've made it through to morning
Though, I bottled every message
That I submerged, then, with alcohol
To softly ease
Their passage

But, now the sun bleeds flame
And, spills a flicker on each word
So, now I lift the weapon
And, I free it
Like a bird

Your ship is in the bottle, now
The wind foresakes your sails
It's burning to the ocean floor
Where it will grow
More scales

"And don't call us Maltesers." - Marquis

I'll probably stick with "odd" and fake the rhyming with accent. I hope Leonard doesn't mind but I needed to vent out this stuff and Hallelujah seemed like a perfect choice.

And right back at ya, this is brilliant:

Your ship is in the bottle, now
The wind foresakes your sails
It's burning to the ocean floor
Where it will grow
More scales

Pretty evocative.

~
Heaven is a place where
Nothing ever happens

Politics.

Inside everyone... is a dictator waiting to get out.
Watching the mistakes others make, and screaming silently.
They scan the newspapers and whisper in our minds,
Approving their disapproval of the world outside.

Sometimes war erupts,
Two tyrant clash, flinging out their armies of words.
Ideas that blitzkrieg like tanks in icy climes.
And strike at heart and mind.

And though we fight the despots call,
To cease that strident voice,
In the end we're occupied,
By thoughts of strife and war.

You sit there in your comfort, you don't believe I'm real. But you cannot buy protection from the way that I feel!