From: T*** F******* [mailto:t************@***********.com]
Sent: Monday, December 12, 2005 4:36 PM
To: 'P** B****'
Subject: phones

P**, Please forward this to everyone.
We are still having phone problems. I need everyone to limit there calls as
much As possible. Try to keep the personal calls down we only have so many
lines out And people try to call or call out are getting buzy signals.

Thanks t***

I'm really buzy today, but I thought I should share this anyway, do show you what buzness in Texas is all about. Please feel free to share your inner-office memos to.

Everybody understands Mickey Mouse. Few understand Herman Hesse. Hardly anyone understands Albert Einstein. And nobody understands Emperor Norton.

About two years ago, I replied to an e-mail from the paralegal coordinator at my firm wherein I stated my personal displeasure with a new administrative directive.

The coordinator sent my complaint up the line to one of the bigwigs in the home office along with the comment, "Can we throw this guy down an elevator shaft?"

The bigwig, idiotically, chose to keep the string going in his reply to me telling me that my displeasure had been noted but that I was to comply with the new procedure nevertheless. He didn't realize he had left this very unprofessional comment from the coordinator in the reply.

Naturally, I saw the opportunity to extract my pound of flesh. I chose to go through HR. I forwarded the e-mail to our office's HR director with the comment, "I do not appreciate the insinuation that I be bodily disposed down an elevator shaft. Do you agree that this is not proper protocol?"

A few days later, the paralegal coordinator (who was an attorney in the firm, btw) appeared at an meeting arranged by the HR director to apologize to me personally for his highly irregular and appalling behavior.

This was the highlight of my professional career as a paralegal. May it rest in peace.

____
Kid, you've paid your dues...dues and dues. ~J. Tweedy

I don't work at an office.

po.waq.qatsi (from the Hopi language, powaq sorcerer + qatsi life)
n. an entity, a way of life, that consumes the life forces of other beings in order to further its own life.

How much did you sue the idiot for?

My Way

I didn't sue him. His shame was all the recompense I required.

I'm kind of like a saint, in case you hadn't figured that out yet, Strawman.

Would you like to see the kissing pictures that didn't make the final cut a few months back when I did my reveal?

____
Kid, you've paid your dues...dues and dues. ~J. Tweedy

This individuals actions were accountable to a firm you clearly despised, Rob.

Save the halo for Hades baby 'cause you're along time dead.

In reply to:

---

Would you like to see the kissing pictures that didn't make the final cut a few months back when I did my reveal?

---

Bring 'em on

My Way

Then I guess this thread doesn't apply to you.

Thanks for the bloody brilliant contribution, squarehead.

Everybody understands Mickey Mouse. Few understand Herman Hesse. Hardly anyone understands Albert Einstein. And nobody understands Emperor Norton.

When my company was still part of a bigger company of about 80000 people, there was a truly smart guy who lost his stapler. He worked in Paris but found it convenient to send an e-mail like this:

to: ourcompany-ww@ourcompany.com
from: cleverguyinparis@ourcompany.com
subject: I've losed my stapler
Has anyone saw my stapler? Who stealed it? (he was French, you know)

This resulted in 80000 e-mails sent all over the world.

Then another clever guy used the oh-so convenient 'reply all' function:

to: ourcompany-ww@ourcompany.com
from: cleverguyinbeijing@ourcompany.com
subject: re: I've losed my stapler

Not me.

Then another one:

to: ourcompany-ww@ourcompany.com
from: cleverguyinlondon@ourcompany.com
subject: re: re: I've losed my stapler

Not me either.

Then another one:

to: ourcompany-ww@ourcompany.com
from: cleverguyinaustin@ourcompany.com
subject: re: re: re: I've losed my stapler

Not me eether.

And so on.

At noon our mail server was down and for a few hours we were unable to communicate with the outside world.

Funny, isn't it?

Marriage is the death of hope.

In reply to:

---

This individual's actions were accountable to a firm you clearly despised, Rob.

---

Prior to this exchange I didn't have any personal issues with the coordinator. And it was the bigwig who failed to keep the comment from reaching me. All in all, I think I had more fun with the situation the way I handled it than if I'd made a big case out of it and threatened (or pursued) a lawsuit.

To put it another way, if I'd sued, the random reader passing through here would think, "What a typical asshole - suing his company for no good reason."

But the way I did respond encourages the reader to react thusly: "Tee, hee. He are funny. I want to go to bed with him."

One hopes, of course, that this reader is a Japanese schoolgirl who sells her used panties for spending money.

Now, let's look at some pictures, shall we?


Noonan? Or Strawman? America Decides!!!


Emmylou Harris performing at the 1983 Mardellostock

____
Kid, you've paid your dues...dues and dues. ~J. Tweedy

I admire that (I don't want to sleep with you though), if more people were willing to accept a public apology (and more people willing to give one), then it would put an end to a lot of the pointless compensation cases which litter the legal system each year.