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Kristin Machina
(stardust savant)
01/08/06 00:45 AM
To David on his 59th new  

"And the rumor spread that I was aging fast"--Width of a Circle

Dear Mr. Bowie,

Well, here we are, celebrating your 59th year on Planet Earth. Admittedly, this was not one of your more fruitful years. The most we heard of you in the past year was an awful collabo with BT for a B-rated evil airplane film (which I have on my iPod anyway because...hey). You gave us all an awful fright when you showed up on stage in Radio City Music Hall with a black eye and bandage (all for show, you cheeky monkey.) On the upside was your brilliant duet with your musical descendants, Arcade Fire on their "Wake Up", and your "Five Years".
Overall, slim pickings music-wise. But considering what happened about a year and a half ago, we're lucky to have heard anything from you.
We were all rudely reminded of your mortality and how stupid the "David Bowie needs to go back on the coke and cigs" arguments are. We almost lost you, but we didn't know how close we came until almost a month after the fact. After all, most of us think you're the eternally youthful, invincible God of Art Rock. It would have killed us to think you were just a mortal human, but you are.
So, as you approach one year closer to *gulp* 60(!), I pray for your continued improving health, hopefully a new album, the return of your cheekbones, and maybe we'll even get to see you shine on stage one more time.
Long may you live, Mr. Bowie, and happy birthday!



Don't understand me, just love me

schizophrenic
(stardust savant)
01/08/06 01:38 AM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Kristin Machina]  

Hear, hear!

Oh, and nice to have you back, Kristin.

I'm always down for some Wang Chung... in bed.


Atonalexpress
(acolyte)
01/08/06 02:02 AM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Kristin Machina]  

well said!

i wrote a poem for David's birthday several years ago and set it to music. you can hear it here:

Crafted Stardust


A Toe Nail

b_mardle
(electric tomato)
01/08/06 04:43 AM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Kristin Machina]  

In reply to:

see you shine on stage one more time


At least one more time! If he still has the motivation, he will have plenty of years ahead of him in the music scene.
But i wouldn't be that chocked if he has only one or two more tours to come from him - just as long as he would continue to release new material again on a regular bases!

I've been too honest with myself
I should have lied like everybody else


diamondogz74
(freecloud)
01/08/06 07:27 AM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Kristin Machina]  

Happy Birthday and many more of them, go on spoil yourself and record a new album, I dare you


London Bye Ta-Ta...

infidel
(kook)
01/08/06 11:39 AM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Kristin Machina]  

.........................
...................................................................
.............................
......................
................



All those Birthday candles are a fire hazard
Happy 59th Birthday David !!!




anisette
(stardust savant)
01/08/06 12:23 PM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Kristin Machina]  

Somebody should try that lollipop trick with a birthday candle. That'd be a hoot!

I want to poop back and forth. ))<>((

Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/08/06 01:20 PM
Re: To David on his 59th [re: Kristin Machina]  

That was very well written, Kristin. I applaud you.



Happy Birthday, David!




Don't dream it, be it.

Mxy
(electric tomato)
01/08/06 02:06 PM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Bamboo7]  

Dear Bowie,

I admire you and all, but I don't really give a shit about your birthday.

Sincerely,
Bill Jemass (Mrs.)

Mxy's Bizarre Webcomic. Updated daily.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/08/06 06:39 PM
Never Get Old new [re: Kristin Machina]  

Dear David,

Go back on coke and cigs and ditch the family. Or retire.

Cheers!

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/08/06 06:41 PM
Re: Never Get Old new [re: Marquis]  

That was very jerk-offish of you.

Don't dream it, be it.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/08/06 06:45 PM
Sowwy Sailor new [re: Bamboo7]  

Oh, get over it. As a celebrity, Bowie's job is to either entertain me or stop besmirching his reputation with subpar shitwipe albums like his last three.

I'm sure there are plenty of 60 year old musicians happily married with young children capable of making interesting music, but Bowie isn't one of them.

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/08/06 06:47 PM
Re: Sowwy Sailor new [re: Marquis]  

But, as a poster on a Bowie message board, your job is to not be a dick when it comes to wishing him a happy birthday.

Don't dream it, be it.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/08/06 06:55 PM
This is a Bowie message board? new [re: Bamboo7]  

So, you're afraid that if I'm mean to him, he won't invite any of us to his party?

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/08/06 06:59 PM
Awww, sourpuss here wasn't invited. new [re: Marquis]  



Don't dream it, be it.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/08/06 07:54 PM
Squeebrains new [re: Bamboo7]  

Ah, the linked picture of a 5 year old joke.






...








(check and mate)

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Monkeyboy
(band intro)
01/08/06 08:08 PM
We have jobs? new [re: Bamboo7]  

In reply to:

your job is to not be a dick when it comes to wishing him a happy birthday.


That is, after all, what a real fan does. Right?

"I was borned in england." - b_mardle

riley
(electric tomato)
01/09/06 02:00 AM
Re: Never Get Old new [re: Bamboo7]  

..so rock gods are emotionally fragile.. disabled people are fair game?

yeah i hope he has a nice b'day and all.. but i think the psychophants on bnet will see his ego's adequately masturbated.. i'm sure he noticed you care though..

madness is relative

NoRoad
(grinning soul)
01/09/06 08:28 AM
Re: Sowwy Sailor new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

I'm sure there are plenty of 60 year old musicians happily married with young children capable of making interesting music



Like who? I can't think of one.



to_dizzy
(electric tomato)
01/09/06 08:32 AM
Re: Sowwy Sailor new [re: NoRoad]  

Bowie has never thanked us once for our happy birthday wishes.



Emil
(acolyte)
01/09/06 08:52 AM
go polanski new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

there are plenty of 60 year old musicians happily married with young children


Indeed, although Bowie's wife could be his daughter she is still one of the oldest in the industry.

or David Bowie.

FastChanges
(stardust savant)
01/09/06 10:11 AM
Re: go polanski new [re: Emil]  

Are you sure? Bowie was 8 when Iman was born.

I, I am a queer
And you, you are a queer too


Emil
(acolyte)
01/09/06 10:16 AM
oh, is she that old new [re: FastChanges]  

I wish there was some search function on the Internet where I could check my facts.

Hm, on the other hand, why would I ever need that when I've got you fellow TWers?

or David Bowie.

Shelle
(crash course raver)
01/09/06 01:41 PM
She's got a toyboy, I know it! new [re: Emil]  

Emil, if you're gonna act the blithering fool here, then that avatar of yours needs changing. It's false advertizing, goddamit!

My advice? Lose the spectacles, and acquire some chin drool.

He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.


Pablo-Picasso
(acolyte)
01/09/06 01:44 PM
Re: She's got a toyboy, I know it! new [re: Shelle]  

Why do you think his chin isn't in view?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Illustrated Discography
Bassman
Helden

Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/09/06 01:49 PM
Boo Hoo new [re: to_dizzy]  

You're all a bunch of ignorant assholes. If you don't have something worthwhile to contribute to this birthday thread, then don't say anything at all. Or, better yet, go start your own. That way, I'll know to stay away from that pile of shit and save myself the trouble of having to wade through it. It's not my fault you're all bitter because no one cares about your "special day".

And yes, there's nothing wrong with a good retard joke every now and then. Especially when it's aimed at Marquis. Get a sense of humor.

Don't dream it, be it.

Shelle
(crash course raver)
01/09/06 01:55 PM
Re: Boo Hoo new [re: Bamboo7]  

I've a feeling you'd be much happier over at Bowienet, snookums. They've more or less got that whole no-life sycophants market cornered.

What's the matter; cat got your credit card?

He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.


Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/09/06 02:01 PM
You seem to know me so well! new [re: Shelle]  

In reply to:

no-life sycophant



Check

In reply to:

cat got your credit card?


and check.

So, until that damn cat decides to return, you're all stuck with me. Ha!

Don't dream it, be it.

Edited by Bamboo7 on 01/09/06 02:02 PM (server time).



Marquis
(acolyte)
01/09/06 02:04 PM
You're me new favorite alter new [re: Bamboo7]  

In reply to:

You're all a bunch of ignorant assholes.




Ignorant of what, please?

In reply to:

If you don't have something worthwhile to contribute to this birthday thread, then don't say anything at all.


Ok, you fascist, I'll refrain from making further posts in this thread if you promise to never type the word "Squee!" in one of *my* threads ever again. If you're in a position to make silly demands, I ought to get one, too.

In reply to:

Or, better yet, go start your own. That way, I'll know to stay away from that pile of shit and save myself the trouble of having to wade through it.


So, you'd be less upset if I started a thread entited "Have a Terrible Birthday, Bowie, and I Hope Iman Buys You an 8-Ball?"

In reply to:

It's not my fault you're all bitter because no one cares about your "special day"




Where'd you pull that from?

In reply to:

And yes, there's nothing wrong with a good retard joke every now and then. Especially when it's aimed at Marquis.


Well, sure, except for a couple of things.

First, that joke isn't good. I mean, sure, it gives one a chuckle the first half-dozen times, but as a "zinger" at the end of a string of huffy self-righteous nonsense, it just doesn't wash.

Second, I may be a lot of things, but retarded clearly ain't one of them. If you really want to become an effective shit-slinger at TW, you've got to take aim at a person's obvious flaws, not just pull some picture off of your friend's LiveJournal. Send a PM to Strawman for further instruction, as he seems to have needling and deflating down to an art.

In reply to:

Get a sense of humor.


I'm sorry, did I miss the post where you were funny? Without the aid of pictures? Cause all I see is you being indignant about someone making a joke at the expense of an old man you've never met.

edit: yeah, this seems like an appropriate 5000th post, dontcha think?

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher

Edited by Marquis on 01/09/06 02:08 PM (server time).



Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/09/06 02:19 PM
Awww, I'm considered a fascist alter! new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

Ignorant of what, please?


Manners.

In reply to:

Ok, you fascist, I'll refrain from making further posts in this thread if you promise to never type the word "Squee!" in one of *my* threads ever again.



How does that even make sense?!? This isn't my thread, genius. And what's wrong with the word Squee?

In reply to:

So, you'd be less upset if I started a thread entited "Have a Terrible Birthday, Bowie, and I Hope Iman Buys You an 8-Ball?"


He can be taught!

In reply to:

Where'd you pull that from?


Awww, apparantly you only read my posts! How touching. And you think when I make a post of my own, it only refers to you! Don't I feel special?

In reply to:

First, that joke isn't good. I mean, sure, it gives one a chuckle the first half-dozen times, but as a "zinger" at the end of a string of huffy self-righteous nonsense, it just doesn't wash.


Yeah, I'll keep that in mind next time I make a joke. "Hmmm, let's see, will Marquis find this in good taste? Guess not. Well, that ends that." Not likely. I'm not here to amuse you. I'm here to amuse me.

In reply to:

I'm sorry, did I miss the post where you were funny?


I guess you did. But wait, I thought you only read my posts!

Don't dream it, be it.

Edited by Bamboo7 on 01/09/06 02:20 PM (server time).



FredPhelps
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/09/06 02:33 PM
too much fag new [re: Kristin Machina]  



godhatesfags.com

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/09/06 04:45 PM
You will bozo me within 24 hours new [re: Bamboo7]  

Wow, you're not very good at this.

In reply to:

Manners.


Elaborate, please. Do you mean that making jokes at Bowie's expense is bad manners and should therefore be verboten?

In reply to:

How does that even make sense?!? This isn't my thread, genius


Really? It sure seems like it, what with the way you're telling me not to post in it any more. Did you forget that you said this: "If you don't have something worthwhile to contribute to this birthday thread, then don't say anything at all."

Sounds to me like a direct order to shape up or ship out, and I wasn't aware you'd been elected to be the general of niceties.

In reply to:

And what's wrong with the word Squee?


A: It's not a word. B: I don't like it. And being that you seem to have no problem trying to ban posts you don't like from a thread you didn't even start, why can't I have the same power over my threads? Does the request have to be made by someone else? Ok, then, Monkeyboy, please stop her from saying "Squee" in my threads.

In reply to:

He can be taught!


I think we both know that had I made such a thread, you'd have whined all over it. Since you loooooove whining.

In reply to:

Awww, apparantly you only read my posts! How touching. And you think when I make a post of my own, it only refers to you! Don't I feel special?


Quite special, evidently, since you've appointed yourself Personal Moderator In Charge of Birthday Wishes. My apologies for assuming that you were referring to me. Reading over the thread again, I'm still not sure what you *are* referring to, as no one has mentioned their own "special day" at all.

In reply to:

Yeah, I'll keep that in mind next time I make a joke. "Hmmm, let's see, will Marquis find this in good taste? Guess not. Well, that ends that."


Which, you realize, is what you're expecting of the rest of us. You didn't find my joke about Bowie's birthday in good taste, so you told me not to post on this thread anymore. Fascist.

In reply to:

Not likely. I'm not here to amuse you. I'm here to amuse me.


Then get a blog, you stupid twat.

In reply to:

But wait, I thought you only read my posts!


You think a lot of things, don't you? Pity none of them make a lot of sense.

I mean seriously, is this your best game? Fucking bring it!

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


anisette
(stardust savant)
01/09/06 04:51 PM
Re: You will bozo me within 24 hours new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

Fucking bring it!


Damn Matty, that's the most riled up I've seen you. I think you have a crush.

I want to poop back and forth. ))<>((

Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/09/06 05:02 PM
I'm bored now. new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

Wow, you're not very good at this.



And neither are you. So, instead of spending the next few days fruitlessly arguing back and forth, I'm gonna quit while I'm ahead. If you can't understand what I'm trying to say by now, you're never going to and I honestly couldn't care less.

Don't dream it, be it.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/09/06 06:48 PM
Score one for the good guys new [re: Bamboo7]  

Translation: "You win again, Marquis."

In reply to:

So, instead of spending the next few days fruitlessly arguing back and forth, I'm gonna quit while I'm ahead.


Psst....

You're not ahead.

You got called out on your fascist attempt to tell me what I can and cannot post, and, unable to justify your actions, reverted to retard jokes and "I'm so above this."


In reply to:

If you can't understand what I'm trying to say by now, you're never going to and I honestly couldn't care less.


Wow, just imagine the wonderland of communication TW would be if we all followed your stringent standards of posting.

For the record, I don't think I've ever expressed an inability to understand your fascist requests, but I am pretty sure you're at least three times as bunched up over this as I am.

In reply to:

anisette's assertion about my riled-up state


Well, you know I like a laugh now and then, and I was hoping that Bamboozled would bring out her A-Game so we could all have as good a chuckle as I've had. Some people just don't know good clean fun when they see it, I reckon.

Apologies to Kristin for hijacking her thread, but then again, all the best threads go tangential sooner or later. Consider my further silence as my birthday present to Uncie Dave.

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


guiltpuppy
(crash course raver)
01/09/06 08:53 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: Marquis]  

Normally I'd stay out of something like this -- out of distinterest, more than anything else -- but damn it Marquis, this is my Booze you're gunning for this time.

In the spirit of focusing on obvious faults, I'll keep it simple: The fact that it's taken you 5000 posts, and you still feel the need to prove yourself against the likes of dogz, mardle, et al, speaks volumes about your position in life. Every post seems to read as a desperate plea: "Oh, I am better than someone in this world, aren't I? Aren't I?"

All things considered, in comparing this habit with the desire to send well wishes to a rockstar, I think it should be clear which is more pitiful.

To be equal you have to add or subtract and I have never liked math.

schizophrenic
(stardust savant)
01/09/06 09:36 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: guiltpuppy]  

In reply to:

The fact that it's taken you 5000 posts, and you still feel the need to prove yourself against the likes of dogz, mardle, et al, speaks volumes about your position in life.


Are you implying that Bamboo7 is on the same level as mardle and dogz?
That seems like an awfully harsh judgement to place on your new internet friend.

I'm always down for some Wang Chung... in bed.


Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/09/06 09:48 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: schizophrenic]  

He tried standing up for me and that's all that matters. Even if he did slip up a bit in the end.

BTW, nice signature.

Don't dream it, be it.

Edited by Bamboo7 on 01/09/06 09:49 PM (server time).



schizophrenic
(stardust savant)
01/09/06 09:50 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: Bamboo7]  

In reply to:

BTW, nice signature.


Actually, it was JarethsGirl who came up with it. But thanks anyhow.

I'm always down for some Wang Chung... in bed.


Bamboo7
(wild eyed peoploid)
01/09/06 09:54 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: schizophrenic]  

I know. I just like the fact that you're parading it around with you everywhere you post.

Don't dream it, be it.

guiltpuppy
(crash course raver)
01/09/06 10:36 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: schizophrenic]  

In reply to:

Are you implying that Bamboo7 is on the same level as mardle and dogz?



Of course not; is her name on the list? It's just that if I'd restricted the criticism to his targeting of Booze, he'd come off much better than he'd really deserve to -- trying to feel superior to her is at least an ambitious, albeit unrealistic, goal.

To be equal you have to add or subtract and I have never liked math.

Emil
(acolyte)
01/10/06 04:38 AM
but she does look a bit old new [re: Shelle]  

In reply to:

Emil, if you're gonna act the blithering fool here, then that avatar of yours needs changing. It's false advertizing, goddamit!

My advice? Lose the spectacles, and acquire some chin drool.


Why, all I did was to misjudge Iman's age by some ten years and then make a self-deprecating joke about it; this, together with some mocking from friends like you totally stole the attention from the fantastic great joke I was trying to pull in the first place.

or David Bowie.

diamondogz74
(freecloud)
01/10/06 09:42 AM
Re: too much fag new [re: FredPhelps]  

You're gonna die this year you old cunt!


London Bye Ta-Ta...

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/10/06 03:24 PM
Shyster University new [re: guiltpuppy]  

In reply to:

The fact that it's taken you 5000 posts, and you still feel the need to prove yourself against the likes of dogz, mardle, et al, speaks volumes about your position in life. Every post seems to read as a desperate plea: "Oh, I am better than someone in this world, aren't I? Aren't I?"


Well, your theory falls apart on a couple of points. First being that I'll wager you can't find a post where I berate mardle in the last 3 months, as I don't think I've bothered to read all the way through one of his posts in that time.

Hell, apart from priceless vocabulary building jokes, I've even laid of Dogz for the most part, though as a constant festering scab, the desire to pick at him is always there.

As for Bamboozles: she wanted to pick a fight, so I gave her her fight. I'm sure we're equally disappointed that she wasn't up to the task, but you shouldn't mistake my animosity for actual anger or self-righteousness. I just think it's funny to annoy internet fascists, and playing the pompous asshole is the quickest, surest way to do it.

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


diamondogz74
(freecloud)
01/10/06 03:34 PM
Re: Shyster University new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

I've even laid of Dogz for the most part, though as a constant festering scab, the desire to pick at him is always there.





London Bye Ta-Ta...

b_mardle
(electric tomato)
01/10/06 03:34 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: guiltpuppy]  

I wouldn't waste your posts on this sad, lying, motherfuckin piece of shit, guiltpuppy.


I've been too honest with myself
I should have lied like everybody else


Monkeyboy
(band intro)
01/10/06 08:04 PM
It's alright to criticize the right person new [re: guiltpuppy]  

Am I an emotional, reactionary dick who is hard to talk sense to when riled up? Yes. But still...

In reply to:

The fact that it's taken you 5000 posts, and you still feel the need to prove yourself against the likes of dogz, mardle, et al, speaks volumes about your position in life. Every post seems to read as a desperate plea: "Oh, I am better than someone in this world, aren't I? Aren't I?"


...there's no need in accusing others of my percieved crimes.

I really don't like seeing Marquis being accused of being the loudest and most annoying voice in the anti-tard army. I think the fact that he has presented the most rational, thought out, and well-worded argument against them might be what it is. I'd like to think that people are too secretly afraid to approach me about the squeaky wheel thing - I actually think that it's far less cool than that.

No, if anyone is deserving of this critique it is me. But until it is actually re-directed to the right person I'll simply say that...well, it isn't directed at the right person.

"I was borned in england." - b_mardle

Monkeyboy
(band intro)
01/10/06 08:12 PM
See what I mean? new [re: b_mardle]  

In reply to:

I wouldn't waste your posts on this sad, lying, motherfuckin piece of shit, guiltpuppy.




See? It's just totally fucking senseless. I need help.

"I was borned in england." - b_mardle

Kristin Machina
(stardust savant)
01/10/06 11:45 PM
Re: Score one for the good guys new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

Apologies to Kristin for hijacking her thread, but then again, all the best threads go tangential sooner or later


And all the best intentioned threads are eventually gang-raped like a pedophile in a Vietnamese prison.

But it ain't no thang.

Don't understand me, just love me

guiltpuppy
(crash course raver)
01/11/06 04:01 AM
Re: It's alright to criticize the right person new [re: Monkeyboy]  

Money, I can understand your frustration at not being singled out as a prick, and that's totally fair. You are definitely the bigger prick. The difference between you and Marquis -- and what makes him ulimately more pathetic -- is that you can fall back on the "I'm just amusing myself and hopefully others" excuse. Which works for you -- your insults are just that, insults, generally off the cuff, not much invested in them. Marquis, on the other hand, can't explain his behavior so easily; his posts aren't merely insults, they're fucking essays, cascades of quote-blocks adding up to some weird proof of the thesis: "I am not, after all, the most pathetic person in the world."

As for not having targeted dogz or mardle in three whole months, Marquis, I say whoopedy-shit. For one thing, that's hardly ancient history, and for another, just because you're picking more respectable targets doesn't make it a more respectable habit.

To be equal you have to add or subtract and I have never liked math.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/11/06 11:08 AM
Me & GP: Brothers in Tears new [re: guiltpuppy]  

Quote Block One:

In reply to:

Marquis, on the other hand, can't explain his behavior so easily; his posts aren't merely insults, they're fucking essays, cascades of quote-blocks adding up to some weird proof of the thesis: "I am not, after all, the most pathetic person in the world."


You make me sad, guiltpuppy.

Look, I'm keenly aware of my many shortcomings as a human being, but I still fail to see how wordy posting is such a damnable offense, or calling someone on their attempt to tell me what my job as a poster is.

Quote Block Two:

In reply to:

For one thing, that's hardly ancient history, and for another, just because you're picking more respectable targets doesn't make it a more respectable habit.


To which I say, again, that I did not select Bumbles as a target, she selected me. People make posts I find insipid all the time, but unless there's something constructive to say (i.e. "You're being a fascist), I tend to refrain from all but the best of personal jabs.

I realize, of course, that you're a pretty smart poster, and there's a good chance that all your righteous indignation here is a well-crafted move to get under my skin by employing the age-old argument which rankles me the most: "He who puts the most effort into his post shall be deemed the biggest loser."

To which I say, as always, tough titty toenails; if you don't want your stupid ideas picked apart, don't bring them to my doorstep.*

*This being an example of what we in the game call a "joke"

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Revol
(electric tomato)
01/11/06 11:29 AM
Re: Me & GP: Brothers in Tears new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

You make me sad, guiltpuppy.

Look, I'm keenly aware of my many shortcomings as a human being, but I still fail to see how wordy posting is such a damnable offense, or calling someone on their attempt to tell me what my job as a poster is. To which I say, again, that I did not select Bumbles as a target, she selected me. People make posts I find insipid all the time, but unless there's something constructive to say (i.e. "You're being a fascist), I tend to refrain from all but the best of personal jabs.

I realize, of course, that you're a pretty smart poster, and there's a good chance that all your righteous indignation here is a well-crafted move to get under my skin by employing the age-old argument which rankles me the most: "He who puts the most effort into his post shall be deemed the biggest loser."

To which I say, as always, tough titty toenails; if you don't want your stupid ideas picked apart, don't bring them to my doorstep.*

*This being an example of what we in the game call a "joke"




Not punish less, rise the pain
Sterilise rapists, all I preach is EXTINCTION


Marquis
(acolyte)
01/11/06 11:37 AM
Point n Clique new [re: Revol]  

See, I knew The Daily Show grew Rob Cordry in a vat, and this just proves it.

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Revol
(electric tomato)
01/11/06 11:47 AM
Re: Point n Clique new [re: Marquis]  

Da svidaniya, faggot!

Not punish less, rise the pain
Sterilise rapists, all I preach is EXTINCTION


Starlite
(acolyte)
01/11/06 12:11 PM
TW makes Bowie cry new [re: Bamboo7]  

In reply to:

Get a sense of humor.


You might wanna look up "irony" in the dictionary, sweetie. After all, you're the one who called the Whaaambulance on an obvious joke post by Marquis.

(Notice how I used a livejournal cliche there for you? You seem to like 'em, so I hope you enjoy!)

Also, I'm somewhat interested in what you find is acceptable for mockery (developmentally challenged individuals) and what is not (rich confident rock legends who don't give a piss what we here think). Who do you suppose is more likely to come across this thread? I can tell you it ain't Bowie.

Guiltpuppy, before you drag your little girlfriend on this messageboard and then get into the unenviable position of having to defend her embarassing fannish loyalty war, you might want to explain to miss Booboo what TW is. And the fact that better posters have been run off for the use of "Squee."



Marquis
(acolyte)
01/11/06 12:18 PM
Creepy Dourif Pix for All! new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

the fact that better posters have been run off for the use of "Squee."


Hey, for the record, I had no part in SugarPlumFairy leaving, and if she'd come back, I'd even be ok with a weeklong festival of *glomping.*

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Shelle
(crash course raver)
01/11/06 01:11 PM
Re: Awww, I'm considered a fascist alter! new [re: Bamboo7]  

In reply to:

And what's wrong with the word Squee?



What does it mean, actually?

I just want to be sure for when I start using it.


He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.


Bamboo7
(kook)
01/11/06 02:18 PM
The ribbon is for me, by the way new [re: Starlite]  

Alright, I can see no one's going to rest until I come back here and continue to argue. So, here goes:

In reply to:

you're the one who called the Whaaambulance on an obvious joke post by Marquis.


Sorry if I'm not Captain Obvious, but I didn't register his remark as a joke. My fault... I guess.

In reply to:

Notice how I used a livejournal cliche there for you? You seem to like 'em, so I hope you enjoy!



Nope. I don't use livejournal so, once again, another "joke" was wasted on me. Before I move on, would you please explain why I "seem to like 'em"?

In reply to:

Also, I'm somewhat interested in what you find is acceptable for mockery (developmentally challenged individuals) and what is not (rich confident rock legends who don't give a piss what we here think)



Well, I'm glad you're interested. I never said that Bowie was not acceptable for mockery. Once again, I didn't see Marquis' post as a joke; just a very harsh statement intended to attract attention to himself, considering the thread it was in. I have no problems with mockery of any kind (especially that of "developmentally challenged individuals") and have never had a problem with any other Bowie mockery I have come across here (which should be quite evident, seeing as I come across it quite a bit here and have never protested against it. Hell, I find it very amusing a lot of the time).
As for the special olympics joke, that was funny. And I'm not taking that statement back. I will continue to find it, and other jokes like it, funny until someone shoves a stick up my ass.

In reply to:

Who do you suppose is more likely to come across this thread? I can tell you it ain't Bowie.



(too easy)

In reply to:

Guiltpuppy, before you drag your little girlfriend on this messageboard and then get into the unenviable position of having to defend her embarassing fannish loyalty war, you might want to explain to miss Booboo what TW is



No, I'd rather have you explain it for me.

In reply to:

Bumbles as a target, she selected me



I selected no one. You started it. I just commented on your post. You started the "shitstorm", as Kristin calls it. At least she can take something like this lightly.

SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!SQUEE!!!

Don't dream it, be it.

Persilot
(stardust savant)
01/11/06 02:42 PM
Come on guys... new [re: Shelle]  

Can't we all just get along?



"We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here, and we want them now."

guiltpuppy
(cracked actor)
01/11/06 02:44 PM
Re: TW makes Bowie cry new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

Guiltpuppy, before you drag your little girlfriend on this messageboard and then get into the unenviable position of having to defend her embarassing fannish loyalty war, you might want to explain to miss Booboo what TW is. And the fact that better posters have been run off for the use of "Squee."



First, it's internet boyfriend. Show some goddamn respect.

Second, as far as stepping in to defend that side of the war, well hell, how am I any less justified in doing so than you are? Hell, I at least have a powerful emotional connection to one of the parties involved: You, on the other hand, appear to be nothing more than a suckfish, attaching yourself to something big and mean and feeding on the dregs of its battles. I have no respect you.

To be equal you have to add or subtract and I have never liked math.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/11/06 02:48 PM
Back for more, are we? new [re: Bamboo7]  

In reply to:

As for the special olympics joke, that was funny.


If you say so, sure. Chuckles are in the ear of the beholder. Then again, it wasn't exactly *your* joke, now was it?

In reply to:

I selected no one. You started it. I just commented on your post. You started the "shitstorm"


Are we reading the same thread, Boobah?

Let's recap:

[Marquis makes rude comment to David Bowie]
[Boobah calls Marquis "jerk-offish"]
[Marquis says, "Boobah, get over it. Bowie is OLD]
[Boobah instructs Marquis as to the nature of his "job" as a poster at TW]
[Marquis makes joke about Bowie not inviting Boobah to his party]
[Boobah steals a lame joke about retarded people]
[Marquis points out that said joke is lame, claims victory]
[Other people say other stuff]
[Boobah sez: "You're all a bunch of ignorant assholes. If you don't have something worthwhile to contribute to this birthday thread, then don't say anything at all. Or, better yet, go start your own. That way, I'll know to stay away from that pile of shit and save myself the trouble of having to wade through it. It's not my fault you're all bitter because no one cares about your "special day"]

I'll make a concession and say that my next post was a harsh personal attack on Boobah (in actuality, it was mostly laughy emoticons and calls for further explanation regarding the snit Boobah has worked herself into).

So, by my tally, you called me "jerk-offish," "retarded," "an ignorant asshole," AND told me what I can and cannot say, all before I even began to explain why you're not as clever as you think you are.

Conclusion? Neener neener neener, you started it!

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Shelle
(crash course raver)
01/11/06 02:49 PM
Nobody does it better new [re: Monkeyboy]  

In reply to:

I'd like to think that people are too secretly afraid to approach me about the squeaky wheel thing - I actually think that it's far less cool than that.



I think it's just that you're at your very best as a poster when you're picking on people, whereas Marquis is at his very worst. When I see a Monkeyboy post at Dogz or whoever, my first thought is "Goodee, this'll be good!". When I see a Marquis post in that vein, my heart sinks and I think "Not again".

I'm not saying Marquis is a lesser poster than you. He's not, it's just his talents lie elsewhere. He's at his funniest when he's talking about himself, exclusively. Nobody here does self deprectation better.

I'm not even saying all his insulting posts are bad. Some of my favorite anti-Shelle posts were penned by the East Coast bald funnyman. Maybe that's the key, he just needs to raise his aim a little. It'd be interesting to see him going for a real heavyweight like Strawman, or even you.

He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.


Bamboo7
(kook)
01/11/06 02:53 PM
Re: Back for more, are we? new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

[Marquis makes rude comment to David Bowie]
[Boobah calls Marquis "jerk-offish"]
[Marquis says, "Boobah, get over it. Bowie is OLD]
[Boobah instructs Marquis as to the nature of his "job" as a poster at TW]
[Marquis makes joke about Bowie not inviting Boobah to his party]...



What are you, blind? I see your name at the top of that list.

Don't dream it, be it.

anisette
(stardust savant)
01/11/06 03:01 PM
Re: Back for more, are we? new [re: Bamboo7]  

ok, so which are you, blind or David Bowie?

I want to poop back and forth. ))<>((

Bamboo7
(kook)
01/11/06 03:03 PM
Now I'm just confused. new [re: anisette]  

??

Don't dream it, be it.

anisette
(stardust savant)
01/11/06 03:07 PM
Re: Now I'm just confused. new [re: Bamboo7]  

marquis insulted david bowie at the top of that list, not you. YOU started it.

I want to poop back and forth. ))<>((

Shelle
(crash course raver)
01/11/06 03:10 PM
Re: Now I'm just confused. new [re: anisette]  

In reply to:

marsquee insulted david bowie at the top of that list, not you. YOU started it.



Started what? The insults?

No, Bowie insulted marsquee first. Remember when he pointed at him during the 50th birthday party and went "Ha, look at the bald man!"


He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.


Bamboo7
(kook)
01/11/06 03:11 PM
Clever but wrong new [re: anisette]  

Ah, now I see what you mean. Clever.

Don't dream it, be it.

anisette
(stardust savant)
01/11/06 03:13 PM
Re: Now I'm just confused. new [re: Shelle]  

hey, i figured since everybody else was referring to david bowie as if he were a real person, with real feelings, i would too.

I want to poop back and forth. ))<>((

Pablo-Picasso
(acolyte)
01/11/06 03:21 PM
Re: To David on his 59th new [re: Kristin Machina]  

Anyway, David Bowie is only 41.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Illustrated Discography
Bassman
Helden

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/11/06 03:21 PM
Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Shelle]  

In reply to:

Maybe that's the key, he just needs to raise his aim a little. It'd be interesting to see him going for a real heavyweight like Strawman, or even you.


Heavyweights like Strawski and Dapper Dan - those two in particular, at least - are aware and vocal of their foibles; there's hardly a need to call bullshit on someone who's willing and capable of doing it for themselves.

As for the tardles, I confess to having gotten a bit out of hand with Dogz in the past. Not that I no longer think of him as a pox on all our houses, just that his inability to engage anyone on the debate about his posting quality frustrated me into becoming more hectoring and obnoxious than was necessary. These days, I leave dullard tending to Monkeyboy, who we all agree has a defter touch.

Which leaves us with this tiff with Boobah. I can see where it would get boring to read, and I don't blame you for glossing over it. As I tried to get across, though, this isn't about animosity and cruelty and feeling superior - my natural reaction when someone gets into an indignant huff about something as trivial as Bowie's birthday is to push them into an even more indignant huff. It may not read as quality humor to anyone else, but as Boobah has taught us, it only matters if *I* find it funny.

Speaking of which...I sincerely hope you and p2c never kiss and make up, cause I think you make the perfect couple just as is.

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Starlite
(acolyte)
01/11/06 03:26 PM
Re: TW makes Bowie cry new [re: guiltpuppy]  

Okay, is it just me, or was there a long post by miss Bambi here previously, now replaced by yours?

In reply to:

how am I any less justified in doing so than you are? Hell, I at least have a powerful emotional connection to one of the parties involved


Because from what I see that's all you have. I'm stepping into this fray because I actually agree with Marquis here and think he has a point (and that Bamboo's sudden high-and-mighty Defender of Teh Bowiefandom routine was totally uncalled for)--and I think so independently of outside factors. My support for him has nothing to do with the fact that I desire some of his sweet, sweet lovin', and am afraid that if I don't come running to back him up, I'll be resigned to swallowing my lonely tears on the couch tonight.

If you want to tell me that you'd have been chivalrously taking Bamboo's side even if he/she/whatever wasn't your current squeeze, then mea culpa I suppose. But it doesn't really feel that way.



Revol
(electric tomato)
01/11/06 03:31 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Marquis]  



Not punish less, rise the pain
Sterilise rapists, all I preach is EXTINCTION


Persilot
(stardust savant)
01/11/06 03:38 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Revol]  

Is there really any need to post the same thing twice?

"We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here, and we want them now."

Pablo-Picasso
(acolyte)
01/11/06 03:39 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Persilot]  

Obviously no-one laughed the first time.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Illustrated Discography
Bassman
Helden

Bamboo7
(kook)
01/11/06 03:40 PM
You still haven't explained TW to me, you know? new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

Okay, is it just me, or was there a long post by miss Bambi here previously, now replaced by yours?



Yeah, it's just you.

Don't dream it, be it.

Persilot
(stardust savant)
01/11/06 03:42 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Persilot]  

God damn it, I wanted to double post, but the website was too clever for that. "This post already exists" well it can kiss my arse.

"We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here, and we want them now."

diamondogz74
(freecloud)
01/11/06 03:42 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Pablo-Picasso]  

What about this time?



London Bye Ta-Ta...

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/11/06 03:45 PM
I've heard it was more salty than sweet new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

My support for him has nothing to do with the fact that I desire some of his sweet, sweet lovin'


It doesn't? Damnit.

In reply to:

I'll be resigned to swallowing my lonely tears on the couch tonight.


As opposed to...oh, hell, I can't say it.

That's why we have FastChanges.

bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher


Revol
(electric tomato)
01/11/06 03:48 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Persilot]  

In reply to:

Is there really any need to post the same thing twice?




Not punish less, rise the pain
Sterilise rapists, all I preach is EXTINCTION


Pablo-Picasso
(acolyte)
01/11/06 03:51 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Revol]  

Billy, have you got to be so anal?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Illustrated Discography
Bassman
Helden

Persilot
(stardust savant)
01/11/06 04:06 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Pablo-Picasso]  

It's not often that I get truly pissed off with someone around here, but posting that piece of shit 3 times has done it for me. Consider yourself a Percynot.

"We want the finest wines available to humanity, we want them here, and we want them now."

Starlite
(acolyte)
01/11/06 04:16 PM
Never figured you for the bashful type new [re: Marquis]  

In reply to:

As opposed to...oh, hell, I can't say it.


Oh, come on, did you think that word choice was accidental?



Revol
(electric tomato)
01/11/06 04:24 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Persilot]  

In reply to:

but posting that piece of shit 3 times has done it for me. Consider yourself a Percynot.


What can i consider myself to be after posting that piece of shit 4 times?

In reply to:

It's not often that I get truly pissed off with someone around here




Not punish less, rise the pain
Sterilise rapists, all I preach is EXTINCTION


Revol
(electric tomato)
01/11/06 04:27 PM
Re: Down on Grand-tard's Farm new [re: Revol]  

Or 5?


Not punish less, rise the pain
Sterilise rapists, all I preach is EXTINCTION


guiltpuppy
(cracked actor)
01/11/06 05:52 PM
Re: TW makes Bowie cry new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

If you want to tell me that you'd have been chivalrously taking Bamboo's side even if he/she/whatever wasn't your current squeeze, then mea culpa I suppose. But it doesn't really feel that way.


I don't feel I've taken anyone's side in the initial argument -- I'm not even sure what the hell it was about, except that it apparently involved David Bowie's birthday and the merits of fascism. To be perfectly honest, I just don't care about either of those things. What I jumped in with was essentially a new topic, which can be summarized as "Squis is a sorry little prick."

Do I believe this is true even when Booze isn't involved? Yes, and I think I made that clear from the beginning. Do I care enough to bring it up when Booze isn't involved? No, I don't. Whether that amounts to mea culpa or not, I don't know, and I don't care: I do not speak your bastard pig language.

To be equal you have to add or subtract and I have never liked math.

Marquis
(acolyte)
01/12/06 10:43 AM
Bus stop fulla fly bitches and Squisers new [re: guiltpuppy]  

In reply to:

Do I believe this is true even when Booze isn't involved? Yes, and I think I made that clear from the beginning.


But never really before this thread, this argument, which you have said you didn't really follow, so something doesn't add up.

It's all well and good for you to harbor anti-Marquis feelings lo these many months - and what a burden to your conscious, what with the adulation and adoration heaped upon me by one and all - but before unleashing them on this thread, you might've wanted to familiarize yourself with the facts.

Facts like:

a) My motives and stratagems for harrassing Boobah are spelled out in triplicate, and have nothing to do with the character traits you ascribe to me

b) In this, as in all things, I am 100% right and correct, and all differing opinions are foolish, wrongheaded, and dumb.

C'mon, pupster.

Feel the love.



bitch niggaz talk behind ya back like a catcher
either M-Y-O-B or B-Y-O stretcher



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