I was 17. It was a very good year.

Do you know who sank the Titanic?
Iceberg. A Jew, again.

I was 19 and my girlfriend had really thick lips. We were in a tent in a camping area in Yellowstone National Park. It was totally unexpected and I think I've only reached such orgasmic heights once and that......is another story....

cra ck

I was 17 and my boyfriend had a really thick dick. We were in a manor in Brittany. It was totally expected and I think I've only reached such orgasmic heights once and that......is just now...

Do you know who sank the Titanic?
Iceberg. A Jew, again.

My first blowjob was an act of masturbation. I enjoyed it in all respects, but my neck was very sore for days.

I was 15 at the time. I am not so limber any more.

I must possess all, or I possess nothing.

The first blow job I gave was at the beginning of the summer following 6th grade during a very surprising game of truth or dare with my best friend.

How we went from drawing cartoons depicting Sonny Bono dieing in lots of interesting ways, (the image of him parachuting into a mine field springs to my recollection) to that, I'll never know.

I do remember briefly holding it in my mouth like a thermometer - not moving my head at all. He thought it was because I didn't know what to do, but really, I was just confused about the stipulations of the dare.

He never came. He might have been too young, I'm not sure.

We hung out one time after that and it was dreadfully awkward, then he avoided me for the rest of the summer.

The Queen promised to ream us with twenty inch cattle prods, and I'm still waiting!

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My first blowjob was an act of masturbation.

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I wish I could do that. Then no need to have relationships with other beings anymore.

Do you know who sank the Titanic?
Iceberg. A Jew, again.

My first job was part time for a few weekdays at one of the local estate agents it was a job which seriously did blow.

don't u wish you're post was hot like mine don't ya don't ya (from that crappy pop song)

How old were you? (sorry but "6th grade" means nothing to me)

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He never came. He might have been too young, I'm not sure.

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You're better at foof-munching and you know it.

Do you know who sank the Titanic?
Iceberg. A Jew, again.

Stop being so smart, Jamie.

Do you know who sank the Titanic?
Iceberg. A Jew, again.

I don't remember my first blow job (I'd like to say 'sadly' but it's probably a good thing that it's escpaed my memory).

I sure as hell remember my best one (and there has been an achingly memorable one more than some of the other amazing ones. That was my first incredible one and I couldn't believe that someone else could know a pussy THAT well! Nothing quite as uplifting as being in the mouth of a professional)







I am your future, I am tomorrow, I am the end

I would have been twelve, then.

I've honestly never munched a foof, but someday my foof will come.

The Queen promised to ream us with twenty inch cattle prods, and I'm still waiting!

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We hung out one time after that and it was dreadfully awkward, then he avoided me for the rest of the summer

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Mmmm hmmmm, some guys just don't look at you in quite the same way once you've had their dick in your mouth. Great yarn, J-Girl.

First one I received was 13. My gym teacher. It was nice and I came, or at least that's how I remember it.

First one I gave was when I was 15. He was a friend of my father's, and he picked me up from school one day. I had a big ass crush on him, so one thing let to another until he was squirting his man juice down my throat.

He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.

see other thread where i talk about breakroom hijinx on a sunday afternoon. still have fond memories of this one, for it's been seldom topped.

i'm a mean motherfucker now but i once was cool

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He thought it was because I didn't know what to do, but really, I was just confused about the stipulations of the dare.

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So you were just trying to get away with doing the bare minimum?

Now, it's up to you whether you want to do just the bare minimum. If you think that just meeting the "stipulations" is enough, well, okay... But some people like to go a little bit farther, and I like to encourage that.

I must possess all, or I possess nothing.

Well, here's what was confusing about the dare. He dared me to suck his dick for 15 seconds. I didn't know a WHOLE lot then, but I knew it generally took longer than that for a guy to get off. So, I didn't think there was any point in making it fancy if there was no real goal other than completing the dare.

However, I've had no complaints since about my technique. Well, there was that one time.. but we were at a weird angle and i had just gotten my braces...

The Queen promised to ream us with twenty inch cattle prods, and I'm still waiting!

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Mmmm hmmmm, some guys just don't look at you in quite the same way once you've had their dick in your mouth.

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Yeah, especially when it's been detached.

The Queen promised to ream us with twenty inch cattle prods, and I'm still waiting!

Another braces story eh?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------
Illustrated Discography
Bassman
Helden

OMG, was that you? So sorry, my little welsh rarebit. Has everthing healed up nicely?

The Queen promised to ream us with twenty inch cattle prods, and I'm still waiting!

In contrast, girls, have always looked at me longingly after they've been subjected to a session of maestro mouth mongering amidst the minge.

18 I believe. I think it was akward as hell but he didn't seem to mind.

"I suppose if I were a lot older--like 40 or 50--I'd be a wonderful sugar daddy to some little queen down in Kensington. I'd have a houseboy named Richard to order around."DB, 1976

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In contrast, girls, have always looked at me longingly after they've been subjected to a session of maestro mouth mongering amidst the minge.

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Nah, that's just the effect of the chloroform wearing off.



I think we all get that feeling “what can I do to help the human race” then you probably like me say fuck it theirs something on the TV - JamieSim

All this talk is making me wish I lived closer to a high school.

I must possess all, or I possess nothing.

I was 14 and I made my first blow job to my greater brother, in our bedroom....he has a very big dick!

----------------------
Claude

aha, sexual abused by a member of your own family and gender. that explains a lot.

Come and buy my tanks

Wow, I leave you guys alone for only two days and this is what happens! Oh well, I guess I'll just have to join in. Let's see, if my mind serves me I believe the first one I gave was around 14. Not too memorable apparantly seeing as I'm sketchy on the details.

Awww, it's a cornucopia of love!

No abuse! But a pleasure for both of us.

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Claude

it seems that pathetic men are drawn to you

i myself have never received a blowjob. i feel it is degrading to the woman. got offered one walking down the street one day though (and she didn't appear to be a prostitute!). that was...interesting

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i feel it is degrading to the woman

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Then let a man do it




London Bye Ta-Ta...

It took 10617 posts, but you made me laugh.



... oh god, please let them find semen in my dead grandmother’s vagina ...

It's so fine to suck the cocks!

----------------------
Claude

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got offered one walking down the street one day though (and she didn't appear to be a prostitute!). that was...interesting

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I was walking down the street in Henley one night with a workmate and these Argentinian polo players ran out of a bar and asked my friend if she's give them a blow job that night. It was pretty funny. They were serious, she had quite a reputation! (She got her job on the polo team by giving one of the Argies a blow job in a Paris night club out on the dance floor!!)

Not sure if any of the girls round here would go that far....... ?


BTW I think I'd love for a girl to give me the lick but I really wouldn't like to return the favour





I am your future, I am tomorrow, I am the end

... Cass please! Our business is our business, thankyou very much!

... and a Stoli and Tonic for me.

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it seems that pathetic men are drawn to you

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Oh yah, you're *soooo* perceptive.

Just to prove your theory, let's have a look at the very first guy I ever got a PM from here.

Let's see.

*rummages in PM inbox*

It's......

It's.....

It's....

from some dude calling himself "dice".

Egalitarian sex is an admirable idea though. But incredibly dull. If people can't switch their PC button off in bed, there's really not much point.


He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.

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Egalitarian sex is an admirable idea though.

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But not accepting blowjobs is not egalitarian unless what dice means is that he never returns the favor, either. In which case... well.

you get the TW annual Hilarity Award for quick witted humor while replying to a post category.


A Toe Nail

only losers keep PMs

loser

and i don't remember sending you a PM in my life except to refuse your repeated attempts to seduce me into playing online chess

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you get the TW annual Hilarity Award for quick witted humor while replying to a post category.

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I thank you.

I thank you all.

He'll have you wrestling midgets in border towns for ten percent of the net.

Post deleted by Shelle