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Starlite
(acolyte)
02/09/06 03:01 AM
Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new  

I have found a wonderful site that reveals all the secrets of a blessed and happy marriage. Having always the welfare of TWers in my bosom, I knew I had to share its glorious message with you.

Ladies, are you suffering any type of marital stress? Do you and your better half ever get into any arguments? Do you wonder how you can make your marriage better? Well, wonder no more!

It's as easy as recognizing what type of man you're with, and behaving accordingly.

1. The Command Man:

Command Men are born leaders. They are known for expecting their wives to wait on them hand and foot. A Command Man does not want his wife involved in any project that prevents her from serving him. If you are blessed to be married to a strong, forceful, bossy man, as I am, then it is very important for you learn how to make an appeal without challenging his authority. If a wife learns early to enjoy the benefits of taking the second seat, and if she does not take offense to his headstrong aggressiveness, she will be the one sitting at his right side being adored, because this kind of man will totally adore his woman and exalt her.

If you are married to a king, honor and reverence is something you must give him on a daily basis if you want him to be a benevolent, honest, strong, and fulfilled man of God. He has the potential to become an amazing leader. Never shame him, and do not belittle him or ignore his accomplishments. Make it your life’s goal to become his queen.

2. The Visionary Man

Visionaries are often gifted men or inventors. They are street preachers, political activists, organizers and instigators of any front-line social issue. The Visionary is consumed with a need to communicate with his words, music, writing, voice, art, or actions. He is the “voice crying out in the wilderness” striving to change the way humanity is behaving or thinking.

The wife of Mr.Visionary should be just a little bit reckless and blind in one eye if she is going to enjoy the ride. Learn how to be flexible, and learn how to always be loyal to your man. You will be amazed at how much happier you will be and how much fun life can be if you learn to just go with the flow — his flow. And once you get it into your head that your husband does not have to be “right” for you to follow him, you will FINALLY be able to say “bye bye” to your overwrought parents, even when they are screaming that you are married to a crazy man. People looking on will marvel that you are able to love and appreciate your husband, but you will know better because you will see his greatness.

3. The Steady Man:

Typically, Steady Men do not become as well known as Command or Visionary Men. They are not odd or stand-out men. They are not loud. They are neither irritating nor particularly magnificent. Women and men alike envy and desire a Command Man. People are often drawn and compelled by the Visionary. But the Steady Man is taken for granted.

If this describes your man, you need to learn how to stand still and listen; then let God move your husband in his own good time. Ask God for wisdom and patience. Seek to always have a gentle spirit. Let him be the one God made him to be: a still, quiet, thoughtful presence — for you!

Also remember this pearl of wisdom:

"It is far better that the job be done poorly by your husband than to be done well by you."

And with testimonies like this, how can you fail to act?


Bamboo7
(kook)
02/09/06 09:23 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

"It is far better that the job be done poorly by your husband than to be done well by you."


You've gotta be fucking kidding me.



Persilot
(stardust savant)
02/09/06 11:17 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

For a moment I misread this post. I thought you were offering Martial advice to the TW ladies... stuff like "Kick a guy in the balls and he's going down for the count. " "How to use a handbag as an offensive weapon in three easy steps." "Using your makeup as camoflage." Sadly I was mistaken.

"Better dead, than smeg."

KModerator
(thunder ocean)
02/09/06 11:20 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Persilot]  

Great minds think alike, for I misread the title like that too.

The glass falls down cracking - I'm so proud

nothingtospeakof
(mortal with potential)
02/09/06 11:32 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

*vomits*





I just beat the internet, the end guy was hard!

carsten
(electric tomato)
02/09/06 11:59 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

Let me guess... the book was printed in Stepford, wasn't it?

/Carsten




Starlite
(acolyte)
02/09/06 01:50 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: nothingtospeakof]  

Actually, the somewhat sad thing is that the book is kinda right.

That is, I could see how following its instructions would definitely get, say, 80% of men to love you and improve your marriage, so long as you don't go crazy from it. Because seriously, people do want someone who's devoted to them, enthusiastic, adoring, and 100% supportive. What this book basically says is: women--act out your husband's fantasy of what you should be like and he will love you!

The Stepford thing is pretty close to the mark, though. She also tells wives that it's their fault if their husband is lusting after any other women, and that to fix it, they ought to do whatever they can to look better than "the office wench."

Also, it is a sin for women to ever deny sex to their husband--even if they are sick, or in pain. And it's also a sin to act half-hearted about it, so sick or in pain or no, women are not only supposed to always be on demand for sex, but also to pretend they are loving it so as to stroke the husband's ego.



guiltpuppy
(cracked actor)
02/09/06 02:34 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Starlite]  

This site confuses me. I want to agree with it, because of my hatred for women, but I also want to trash it, because of my hatred for God.

(Edit:) Okay, this quote just changed my mind:

"Mum loves 'Created To Be His Help Meet.' It has really helped Ma with submission and obedience. And the home is quiet (instead of hearing Ma fight with Pa!). We are a happier family."
~ C. (age 8)

Praise be unto God! Help!

Edited by guiltpuppy on 02/09/06 02:38 PM (server time).



Strawman
(acolyte)
02/09/06 03:01 PM
Father Was An Obstacle new [re: guiltpuppy]  

In reply to:

because of my hatred for women


Mother Complex?



Shelle
(cracked actor)
02/09/06 03:05 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

I don't think I'd actually want to marry a command man, a visionary man or a steady man. Maybe some combination of the three. I like my playmates a little more rounded than these rather 1D types.

Rounded, I said. Not fat. Don't get excited, Strawman.

Extremists on both sides are driving the bus. Not just that, but they've persuaded the rest of us to pay to have the bus converted into a tank, and we're not allowed to look outside to see for ourselves what's really going on.


Beltene
(stardust savant)
02/09/06 03:54 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

This is all great bullshit.

In reply to:


If this describes your man, you need to learn how to stand still and listen; then let God move your husband in his own good time. Ask God for wisdom and patience. Seek to always have a gentle spirit. Let him be the one God made him to be: a still, quiet, thoughtful presence — for you!


jesus Fucking christ, girl, where did you get that from? The book of mormons?


I fart in your general direction.

Beltene
(stardust savant)
02/09/06 04:03 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

act out your husband's fantasy of what you should be like and he will love you


Fuck that shit! Get yourself what this book refers to as steady(while other books refer to as _supersensitive_)and you'll never have to worry about what he likes. What makes a "steady man" happy is your happiness. I love _supersensitive_ men. I can't be in a relationship with someone who wants to control everything and I can't be in a relationship with someone who's more dedicated to some stupid cause or some stupid research shit.



I fart in your general direction.

Tristan
(legendary cowboy)
02/09/06 07:45 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  



NOTES FROM A THOUGHTFUL HUSBAND

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.
My name is Ron. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Julie. When I took early retirement last year, it became necessary for Julie to get a full-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed. Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf course about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think, for example, she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the yard. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And,as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other... Ron





Below are two birds.


Study them closely.


See if you can spot which of the two is the female.


It can be done.


Even by one with limited bird watching skills.






In reply to:

Actually, the somewhat sad thing is that the book is kinda right.

That is, I could see how following its instructions would definitely get, say, 80% of men to love you and improve your marriage, so long as you don't go crazy from it. Because seriously, people do want someone who's devoted to them, enthusiastic, adoring, and 100% supportive. What this book basically says is: women--act out your husband's fantasy of what you should be like and he will love you!


You've just gained my respect, Starlite. Wanna get married? This could be a teenagewildlife proposal.





THE WORLD'S SHORTEST FAIRY TALE

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said, "NO!" And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing, hunting and played golf a lot and drank beer and farted whenever he wanted.

THE END


EDITOR'S NOTE:
Ron died suddenly Thursday August 26. He was found with a Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II rammed up his backside, with only 4 inches of grip showing. His wife Julie was arrested, but the all-woman Grand Jury accepted her defense that he "accidentally" sat down on it.........................very suddenly!















229


Starlite
(acolyte)
02/10/06 01:00 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Tristan]  

In reply to:

You've just gained my respect, Starlite. Wanna get married? This could be a teenagewildlife proposal.


I think Twister and Jossie have the hold on that one.

But actually, despite how this book makes me recoil, I have to say... the end result of its suggestions is, in fact, not too different from how I'd aim to act in a relationship.

That is, I would definitely have my own goals and hold my own side of the argument. And I wouldn't let anyone boss me around, especially if I thought their instructions were ridiculous. But, when I am really into someone, I naturally get excited and enthusiastic about their interests, and often take them for my own. (This isn't confined to romantic relationships... I'm always happy to expand my range of interests, and I try to find friends who can introduce me to new things.) Also, when I'm really giddy about someone, I get a lot of pleasure out of playing the housewife role. So, though I don't often cook or clean, etc, when I like someone, I suddenly get strong urges to make them meals, clean up after them, and be all caretaking and submissive. (Though if we're living together, I will expect him to do his share.) I also like getting them gifts, which guys are not so into, unfortunately. :-/ If I dated a girl, I'd totally get her flowers all the time.

And I actually think the Bible instructions about a husband's and wife's bodies belonging to each other, and thus each one having a right to sex is kind of true. That is, I would never carry it as far as forcing myself when I'm in pain or have some other significant reason, or have just had an argument, but I do believe that one should give one's significant other sex whenever one can. Even if you're not really "in the mood," I don't think it's too much to ask to just try. (Though to be honest, I'm not sure what "not in the mood" really entails, as it's pretty easy to get in the mood.)

Now, I am damn argumentative, but I'm kind of working on that, because even I think it's a bit too much. Also, ideally the person I'd fall in love with would have enough common views with me that arguments would be sparse. And as for trivial things, like what place to go to or whatnot, I'm usually nonchalant enough to agree to the other's suggestion anyway.

(Except colors. Hmmm. I would not be easily persuaded to decorate an apartment if I didn't like the style or color.)



Vanessa_Y
(crash course raver)
02/10/06 01:20 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

I too thought this thread was going to show me how to defend myself, lol.

I agree mostly with what Starlite here said. I am very willing to compromise but God help the man who tried to force himself on me (not that hed have to if we were married, Im always in the mood). Any man who I do marry will have to help with the house, as we will BOTH more than likely be working jobs. Im a kind of..give and take person. But I get taken from alot, for some reason. I would say Im the most independent girl ever, but I am not lol. I put alot into relationships, probobly becoming what starlite said there, submissive. But I do like to give,alot,to someone deserving. Unless the person Im giving to never returns the favor or is an ungrateful ass.

Again, like I said, I will compromise..but I once dated a man who tried to change me. He bought me clothes that HE wanted me to wear, which normally I don't mind wearing things that the guy I like likes to see me in, but this was differnt. He said I was too old to wear pink, should wear simpler shoes, should have a degree and a career and be a mom and ready to work his farm- I was 18. He wanted everything about me to be differnt, changed, to fit into everything about him. H e wanted me to change my taste in music, in my personality, the way I wore my hair. I honestly thought something was wrong with me until one day it hit me that he wasn't doing any work into anything at all, and was treating me like crap. How exuasting that relationship was!

"I suppose if I were a lot older--like 40 or 50--I'd be a wonderful sugar daddy to some little queen down in Kensington. I'd have a houseboy named Richard to order around."DB, 1976




guiltpuppy
(cracked actor)
02/10/06 06:26 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Starlite]  

Why is it the female contingent on this board that's defending these "rules?" I mean, all kidding outside, this is some ridiculous and repugnant stuff.

In reply to:

the end result of its suggestions is, in fact, not too different from how I'd aim to act in a relationship.



You aim to surrender all sense of self-worth? Cause otherwise, we're just reading this thing differently.

I have a big problem with any relationship advice that is built around gender roles, because there's always going to be inequity in that. The only concepts with any validity in those paragraphs apply equally well to men.

Truthfully, I don't think a completely healthy relationship should even acknowledge gender. I don't see Booze as female, or male, or androgynous for that matter. I see Booze as Booze, removed from all other categories of being, unique. And I hope to be viewed in the same way.



Bamboo7
(kook)
02/10/06 02:07 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: guiltpuppy]  

I love you. I love you. I love you.



Starlite
(acolyte)
02/10/06 02:09 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: guiltpuppy]  

In reply to:

Why is it the female contingent on this board that's defending these "rules?"


I'm not defending them, I think they're awful. I'm just interested in the fact that I think they'd work.

In reply to:

Truthfully, I don't think a completely healthy relationship should even acknowledge gender.


Yeah, I agree with that. That's actually why I also have a thing about not dating Russian men--it's not a set-in-stone thing, but Russian men in general are a bit more old-fashioned (they'd say "polite") in how they treat a woman. And having someone do anything for me just because I am "a woman" really drives me up the wall. (Ie, if you open the door for me or help me with my coat or whatever because you like me, and you allow me to return the favor whenever I feel like it, that's cool. If you feel obliged to do so because that's "how one treats a lady," I get annoyed.)





Shelle
(cracked actor)
02/10/06 02:29 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

Now, I am damn argumentative, but I'm kind of working on that



Why? That's the only thing you mentioned that's a good point in my book.

Extremists on both sides are driving the bus. Not just that, but they've persuaded the rest of us to pay to have the bus converted into a tank, and we're not allowed to look outside to see for ourselves what's really going on.


Starlite
(acolyte)
02/10/06 04:18 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies new [re: Shelle]  

In reply to:

Why? That's the only thing you mentioned that's a good point in my book.


Hahah, no, trust me, it's not my best point. The fact that I will stand up for myself and that I can argue quite passionately without necessarily getting angry is a good point. The fact that I often start up unnecessary arguments about random stuff (mostly general-ethical-issues related, not relationship related), sometimes as a way to relieve stress--not a good point.

Oh, but I forgot one thing. Besides me enjoying playing the housewife role, I do see it as exactly that--a role I play for fun. I'm also really quite bossy.



Bandit
(cracked actor)
02/10/06 07:42 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Starlite]  

I was married to one of those "Command Men" for 23 years. He was an emotional bully though not physically abusive. I have always had a submissive personality, and he took advantage of that. Though when finally the worm turned and I left and began to stand up to him, he didn't know what to make of it, and still has no idea of what he did over the years.

Now I'm in a relationship with a Dominant man, and have been for the last two years. He may be Dominant but he loves me very much and has always treated me wonderfully. What we do in our relationship is always consensual (I mean in a BDSM context). The contrast between him and my former husband is huge.

Yes I serve. I cook, clean and do all the chores. It has evolved naturally to me to serve his meal before mine, or make him a cup of tea when he asks for one. Yes he asks, and thanks me when I get it for him. I am loved and respected, and I trust this man with my life, as he trusts his to me. You see, he is diabetic and has many health problems. I have literally saved his life on many occasions.

I'm just trying to point out that it isn't all bad to be subservient in a relationship, so long as it is consensual and agreed upon by both parties

The difference between pleasure and pain is perception

Vanessa_Y
(crash course raver)
02/10/06 08:32 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Bandit]  

I think I might have an interest in what you guys call your "lifestyle" ..but it scares me greatly because there does seem to be alot of abusers hidden and disguised as .."doms" . lol.

"I suppose if I were a lot older--like 40 or 50--I'd be a wonderful sugar daddy to some little queen down in Kensington. I'd have a houseboy named Richard to order around."DB, 1976




Vanessa_Y
(crash course raver)
02/10/06 08:33 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Starlite]  

But is it wrong for me that I LIKE when guys do that for me, because Im a girl?

"I suppose if I were a lot older--like 40 or 50--I'd be a wonderful sugar daddy to some little queen down in Kensington. I'd have a houseboy named Richard to order around."DB, 1976




Bandit
(cracked actor)
02/10/06 10:54 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Vanessa_Y]  

In reply to:

I think I might have an interest in what you guys call your "lifestyle" ..but it scares me greatly because there does seem to be alot of abusers hidden and disguised as .."doms" . lol.


Oh yes there certainly are.....players and wanna be's abound. I have heard many horror stories of people being raped and abused because they thought they'd met the perfect Dom/Master for them, mainly because they jumped in too quickly in a bid to experience what they have possibly waited a long time for.

There are things you can do to help keep yourself safe, if you want to know anything feel free to PM me and I will try to find some helpful links for you

The difference between pleasure and pain is perception

Beulah
(grinning soul)
02/11/06 01:44 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Bandit]  

I agree with you, Bandit. It is all about give and take. I like it that my man is the dominant one in the relationship. There are lots of advantages. I'm also doing the chores and I am happy to do them by myself without his help. Watching him trying to help is just too painful. He cannot clean properly to save his life. I let him do the cooking which he is actually better at than me.

He is definitely the bossy kind who likes things his way but I don't exactly run around to please him. Depends how I feel. I sometimes take orders and I sometimes ignore him. Overall we get along splendidly. I don't lose my temper nearly as often as he does, but when I do I can actually see the fear in him .



Shelle
(cracked actor)
02/11/06 01:49 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Vanessa_Y]  

In reply to:

I think I might have an interest in what you guys call your "lifestyle" ..but it scares me greatly because there does seem to be alot of abusers hidden and disguised as .."doms"



The wannabes and fakes are easy enough to spot if you have decent antennae.

The true Doms are always total gentlemen.

In a proper Dom/Sub relationship, it's the subbie who is really in control, because he or she is setting the limits the Dom has to respect.

Extremists on both sides are driving the bus. Not just that, but they've persuaded the rest of us to pay to have the bus converted into a tank, and we're not allowed to look outside to see for ourselves what's really going on.


Vanessa_Y
(crash course raver)
02/11/06 05:11 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Shelle]  

My antennae needs fixing.

I don't think I know any gentlemen, let alone gentle men who have a clue as to...any of the things that people in the"lifestyle" talk about. I myself don't even know too much yet. Just that I know certain things I wouldn't ever do lol.
Though sometimes I think I have met people who "fit" the dom/sub type, without really knowing about any of that. Its just their personality.
I did get a few websites recommended to me ( thanks!!) but now I gotta take a look at them without mentally labeling myself or making myself feel silly, stupid, or bad.

"I suppose if I were a lot older--like 40 or 50--I'd be a wonderful sugar daddy to some little queen down in Kensington. I'd have a houseboy named Richard to order around."DB, 1976




Bandit
(cracked actor)
02/11/06 07:22 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Vanessa_Y]  

In reply to:

I gotta take a look at them without mentally labeling myself or making myself feel silly, stupid, or bad.


I went through that too, thinking I was weird and strange for feeling pleasure from things "vanilla" people would shy away from. But my Dom explained it as a perfectly normal thing, it is the way I am wired and he loves that I am this way

And what the heck is "normal" anyway? I've never felt normal I was always thought of as "the weird one" for liking Bowie when others my age were into the Bay City Rollers *yuk* I never fitted in no matter how much I wished I did, because then I would have been happy with the way my life was instead of feeling sad and like something was missing.

People like to pigeonhole themselves and others, so they know where they fit on the scale of human society. "Oh she's a bi submissive, she can't be anything else" *rolls eyes* There are also many levels of submission, from only sexual to TPE (Total Power Exchange), from role playing in a scene to 24/7 slavery. One type is not better than the other, though some will try to tell you different! If you and your partner are happy with what works for you, then what other people think doesn't matter.

The difference between pleasure and pain is perception

Vanessa_Y
(crash course raver)
02/11/06 09:15 PM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Bandit]  

LOL I have no partner. I DO know (and have had people tell me I couldn't know unless I tried, which to me is kinda..bullshit) I could never be a 24/7 slave nor total power exchange, like you said, becuase There is a huge part of me that is strongly independant.

LOL..try listening to Bowie when other people your age listen to Nelly.

"I suppose if I were a lot older--like 40 or 50--I'd be a wonderful sugar daddy to some little queen down in Kensington. I'd have a houseboy named Richard to order around."DB, 1976




riley
(electric tomato)
02/12/06 00:04 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Ladies [re: Starlite]  

In reply to:

but I do believe that one should give one's significant other sex whenever one can. Even if you're not really "in the mood," I don't think it's too much to ask to just try.


I'll have to disagree on this one.. if someone has to 'try' so hard to get turned on by a lover that would just make it a pity fuck without any passion.. if the other wants it so much they should either learn the fine art of seduction or have a wank. Lazy bastards.

madness is relative

Bandit
(cracked actor)
02/12/06 05:06 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: riley]  

In reply to:

but I do believe that one should give one's significant other sex whenever one can. Even if you're not really "in the mood," I don't think it's too much to ask to just try.


I must have missed this bit. My ex would never touch me unless he wanted sex. He never showed affection, was critical of me, and never told me he loved me. I can even remember the "signal" he'd do in bed when he wanted it, he'd brush his hand across my head and touch my opposite shoulder. I'm supposed to turn on like a light switch just because you wanna get your rocks off?? I don't think so

He'd get mad when I said no, and persist for days with the silent treatment, making me feel so bad about everything and guilty that I couldn't enjoy it, that I'd give in to keep on his good side. Have you ever had sex with someone you felt absolutely nothing for......it is horrible. He would get impatient with me and just push into me, it would hurt and I'd feel worse than before......it was marital rape.

This went on for years......why didn't I leave years ago you say? Low self esteem was one reason, plus I had two kids to consider. He never hit me, but the emotional wounds were just as bad I have since realised.

It's been almost 4 years since I left him - I am now in a very happy relationship where I am loved, cared for and respected. It's shown by word and gesture every single day. And I'm happy to say that there's nothing wrong with me sexually, everything works just fine

The difference between pleasure and pain is perception

guiltpuppy
(cracked actor)
02/12/06 06:30 AM
Re: Instructions on Marital Conduct for the TW Lad new [re: Bandit]  

In reply to:

Have you ever had sex with someone you felt absolutely nothing for......it is horrible.



Not to take anything away from your misfortune (and congratulations on getting out of and past it, by the way), but I've always found sex with someone you do feel things for to turn out much more horribly in the long run.



Strawman
(acolyte)
02/12/06 07:07 AM
Agreed new [re: guiltpuppy]  

I recall a girl that I had enormously strong feelings for - she possessed everything I was looking for in a girl around that time in my life - prettiness, popularity, a vulnerability that I loved to exploit and she was genuinely interested in everything I did, except sex It took me the best part of three & a half months to finally get into her knickers and when I did I discovered that she had the most stinkiest twot one could ever imagine Turns out it was a medical condition which couldn't be remedied & sweet smelling vaginal deodorants constantly gave her thrush, so naturally I had to move on.

Shame - she was a nice girl.



riley
(electric tomato)
02/12/06 07:17 AM
Re: Agreed new [re: Strawman]  

Maybe you guys need to remember the 'no kissing' rule.

madness is relative


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