I have found that my computer slows down considerably when I browse Teenage Wildlife while downloading porn. Oddly enough, this problem is even worse when the porn is a golden shower video. Please fix this immediately.

"That's absiludicrous" - Mr. T from Be Somebody Or Be Somebody's Fool

Are you sure it's not because you don't have any hands on the keyboard or mouse?

We all lie in the fun house

In reply to:

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Are you sure it's not because you don't have any hands on the keyboard or mouse?

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I lost my hands in a horrible accident with a cotton gin. I'm only able to type by putting a couple of pencils up my nose and poking at the keys while slowly driving the pencils further into my nasal cavity. Perhaps if I didn't sharpen them that wouldn't hurt so much but I have dignity, damnit.

Anyways, thanks a lot for making a joke about my painful life. I hope you're happy.

"That's absiludicrous" - Mr. T from Be Somebody Or Be Somebody's Fool

In reply to:

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I lost my hands in a horrible accident with a cotton gin. I'm only able to type by putting a couple of pencils up my nose and poking at the keys while slowly driving the pencils further into my nasal cavity. Perhaps if I didn't sharpen them that wouldn't hurt so much but I have dignity, damnit.

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I don't want to give the impression of making fun of your terribly painful life, but those were the best three sentences in the history of TW.
Well, for as long as I can remember anyway.
Which isn't very long, but never mind that.

Access // Amnesia // Interface

I'm such a fucking insensitive pig. I had better learn to keep my mouth shut.

We all lie in the fun house

The main problem is that you have been downloading too many free previews and I'm afraid that comes at a price.

Remember that link which read "Her tight pussy is stretched open. Download all our quality movies for only $9.95" ?

Well you ought to click on that and sign up, you cheapskate!


© Dr. Evil

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E> (evilwebmaster@teenagewildlife.com)

Paying for porn is like paying for sex, only less gratifying. I oppose.

Knickers to the Prime Minister, balzo.

To be equal you have to add or subtract and I have never liked math.