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AAAAAAAHHH!
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AAARRRGGGHHH!
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Beano?
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Chortle
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Guffaw! Guffaw!
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willies
It doesn't seem that anybody is taking me seriously. As usual. It is not until everybody is covered in bees that they do. That's right. Covered in bees and running around. Then it's "Oh DrCrane! I'm covered in killer bees! What should I do?" I tell them they should roll around on the ground swatting at themselves until they expire. And then I move on to the next board.
How many more bee attacks is it going to take? Four? Five? A million? I'm tired of people laughing at my bee awareness. Do YOU know what a killer bee looks like? And if you do, how do you know the bee you are looking at right now is not a killer bee PRETENDING to be a normal bee? The point is. I don't either! I can't run in the park naked anymore! Hardly anybody can!
So what normally happens is the bees arrive. Everybody sets fire to the place for some reason. The bees win. I'm sick of the bees winning. I want to be naked! I want to eat honey again! I want everybody to love me for warning them about the bees! I want attention! I miss my mother! I want a girlfriend! It's my fault little Billy died!
Well. Now I feel better. If anybody wants me I'll be in the Collector's Corner hiding from the bees...
In all your "failsafe" techniques to protect this messageboard, is there a provision against an attack by killer bees?
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In reply to:
It doesn't seem that anybody is taking me seriously. As usual. It is not until everybody is covered in bees that they do. That's right. Covered in bees and running around. Then it's "Oh DrCrane! I'm covered in killer bees! What should I do?" I tell them they should roll around on the ground swatting at themselves until they expire. And then I move on to the next board.
If this truly is the story of your life, Dr Crane (and gormless as I am, I'm willing to take you at face value), then might it not be the case that you need to add some more skills to your armoury than a mere knowledge of killer bees? Political skills, or salesmanship at least, so that when you alert a board to the obvious dangers, they won't say "Who is this new weirdo and why should I care what he says when I could be whacking off to pics of the lovely but scary Beltene?", but rather "Well, I never thought about it before, but if someone as sensible as Dr. Crane is concerned, then clearly I should".
Also, you need a white coat. We demand white coats of our scientists, if we are to take them seriously. You might also perhaps look into developing some eccentric-looking tics.
Slan leat,
Dara
At what age does the answer to "I love you!" become "Creepy fucker"?
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Re: We Three G's Ain't Nuttin' Ta Fuck Wit
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