It started with a sprinkle as it usually does. Then a steady pitter-patter. Then a deluge from the heavens. It just wasn't The Great Blaather MbBlenzy's day, in fact, he'd already had his day a few years back and he figured that was all he was going to get, and even that day hadn't been so great.
Blaather trudged through the rain. There was no point in running, he'd probably slip over and get all muddy. Just as he thought that he slipped over anyway and got all muddy, and bit his lip to boot.
The laughter of that evening was still ringing in his ears. In the end he had seen David stand up and depart the train station bar. He had to do something quick, he had to rely on his quick thinking and speed, of which he had very little.
What he did then surprised even himself, he simply rushed over and tried to jump on to the rock star. Fortunately David seemed quite dazed after his conversation with "Mrs Big Earlobes" so he didn't react quite quick enough to stop him, but Blaathers jumping skills weren't too spectacular. Tongue sucking midgets just can't jump. So he ended up clinging to David Bowie's waist, trying to climb the man as a cat will try to climb your leg. As he got closer to his face he puckered up and accidentally made a slurping sound as he reached with his lips for the tongue his mission depended on.
He thought it was the slurping sound that shook Bowie out of his dazed state. All of the sudden the prospect of this midget crawling up him wasn't so attractive anymore.
"shoo! shoo!", David hissed as he swatted at Blaather diligently, all the while people laughed and pointed as always. Some clapped thinking it was some kind of show.
Blaather ran, he was nearly in tears. Why had he been let down? Was it his fault? Yes. Probably it was. Blaather had never been able to do anything right.
Now he walked on towards his meeting with the blasted fiend Nyartholep. He was scheduled to meet him 15 minutes ago at the "Boogaboo to you!" coffee shop to discuss a change in plans. All Blaather wanted now was a change of pants.
Constable Reale was having a hard time doing this interview. The pieces just weren't fitting together, and when they did the picture didn't match. He decided to stop doing his jigsaw puzzle and concentrate squarely on his questioning of one Q. Tarantino.
"You say you planned to shoot this movie on the moon? Why on Earth would you do that?", Reale reiterated, for some reason Tarantino was often losing focus.
"Not the Earth man...The Moon!", Tarantino said, placing extra emphasis on the word Moon.
"Why Moon?", Reale responded slowly and clearly.
"Cause it's cheap for one thing! I mean, who else films on the Moon? Can you name me one other Moon movie nigger?"
"You know Quentin, your constant use of the word nigger isn't helping you much here."
"It helps me speak to the people man! Anyway, can you imagine the slow-mo action with nazis jumping high in the air and moondust flying around as bullets hit the moonscape?"
"How the hell were you going to get to the moon anyway?"
Tarantino leaned over as if to tell a great secret, he whispered, "Iggy knows a way, and I know Iggy man!"
Reale had just about had enough, "Come Quentin, out with it, who sold you the drugs?"
"Why Iman of course man! I didn't even have to buy them, she gives them out for free man! That Iman is one groovy chick!"
As Tarantino said this Reale swivelled around in his chair, and focussed on the calender hung up on his office wall. It had a picture of Iman on it, and her face beckoned to him. It seemed to say to him that they would meet one day, fate would lead him to her. All he needed was to get rid of that blasted Bowie.
Bowie read his newly found book, a book which gave new meaning to the word serendipity. At first he had thought it was some kind of self help book, which would have been ok, he needed a lot of help himself. Then as he read further he found himself lost in a tale that sung to him as if it was him.
It was a tale of a lost civilisation from Mars. A civilisation that had their sterile environment threatened by the growing of trees and the spread of harmful oxygen. Everywhere water was becoming clean and new life forms where popping up. This just wouldn't do.
What could they do to stop this spread of life and diversity? Some of the leading Martian environmentalists thought the wise option would be a kind of planetary suicide. They figured that if a blast big enough was maintained for long enough then Mars would be knocked out of her current orbit and this would spell the end of life on Mars. The plan was roundly applauded and accepted by everyone, except for one being, a being who believed that the less control beings tried to exert over their world, the more things fell into place.
This being was locked up for a very long time. Long enough to witness the death of his beloved planet. Long enough to realise that all he knew and loved was gone. Long enough to ponder to himself, "Why the hell am I still here then?"
All the sudden little Alex cried out. She'd soiled herself, and David didn't blame her, a pink monkey was sitting awfully near.
"shoo! shoo!", David waved the book at the dastardly monkey, and accidentally threw it out the window.
"Well that's disappointing", he thought to himself, and left with Alex to change her. There was only another 20 minutes until they would be at the airport, and the good feeling he once had was not with him anymore.
Perhaps Iman had some drugs that would help with that.
Water which is too pure has no fish
TS'AI KEN T'AN