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Kristin Machina
(crash course raver)
09/27/01 11:33 PM
Splitting Headache--Lunch Break [re: Kristin Machina]  

OK, here's a quickie...they'll be more tomorrow..
"Grrrrrrr...." a growl came from Halloween Jack.

Jareth turned up his slender nose, "Don't growl at me, you filthy curr!"

"Uh, I didn't," Jack said with a quizzical look on his face.

"Grrrrrr...." it still came from Halloween Jack, only lower...

"Um," Jack licked his lips, "it's my belly."

Hunky Dory apprehensively creeped under Zane's skirt...

Zane: "Dory, get out of there! Go hide in Earthling's coat."

Tin Machine, "Trying to pass up a pussy between your legs, Zane?" That witty line earned Tin a whack on the head with Nana's cane.

Nana: "For shame, Mr. Machine! There are ladies present! And...Algeria! That wasn't funny!"

Poor Mr. Touchshriek was beside himself with asthmatic giggles. Then his stomach rumbled, too.

Soon came the wave of rumbles from the group.

"I'm hungry," Grace pouted.

"Not now!" Aladdin Sane said, "The Goblin King was about to tell us how the get home!"

Jareth shook his head, annoyed, "There is a troubling lack of focus among the Bowies. Now if could all just pay attention and..."

Boz, "Hypoglycemia-may-impair-mental-function, plus-the-added-discomfort-of-a-stomach-churning-nothing-but-acid, not-to-mention-the-potential-internal-injury..."

Liza said, cheerfully, "It's agreed then! Let's talk over lunch!"

Aladdin: "I'm not hungry."

Jareth: "Me neither."

Major Celliers scowled, "Being around HIM," pointing to the wizard, "ruins my appetite!"

Zero: "Mine too."

Yankee, "I've written my best stuff on an empty stomach..."

Earthling stomped his foot. A sonic boom shook the ground underneath Jareth's dome, and knocked all Bowies to their collective behinds!

Nathan staggered back up, "Earthling!"

Earthling, "Sorry, but I don't like using my special ability too often. It feels like a waste of energy. Aladdin," he addressed the genie, unaffected since Aladdin can float, "you wanna bring us all together, right?"

Aladdin nodded.

"Well, then, a meal is the perfect setting! Break some bread and mend some bridges."

Newton scratched his wig, "But we couldn't go over any bridges. We couldn't leave the island!"

Earthling: "Figure of speech, mate. Now can we put aside all the bullshit and get something to eat?"

There was a long, thoughful pause.

Major Tom: "I've saved some food packets from my capsule, in emergencies--proteiin pills, Vitamin droplets, evaporated milk--Oh, I've got a toothpaste-like container that's really a lovely ham sandwich..."

The Bowies: "Uh, no thanks..." "Thanks, no, Major..."

Then, Pierrot made a series of gestures--he appeared to be tossing a large disk over his head and spinning it around. The disk gets larger and larger...

"Pizza!" Yankee shouts! Pierrot smiles and nods, then mimes a pie falling on his face. Yankee says, "Of course, this city is known for great pizza!"

Jareth sneered, "I don't like pizza."

Berlin folded his arms, "You've probably never HAD pizza."

Jareth: "That's how I know I don't like it," he stubbornly folded his cape around him.

Earthling: "All in favor of pizza, raise your hands."

Everyone did--except the Goblin King.

Major Celliers smiled mischieviously, "All in favor of instituting cannibalism, starting with one over-coiffed, tight-wearing fairy-tale outcast..." the Bowie closed in on...

"OK, OK!" Jareth cowered, "Fine! Just as long as it's someplace tasteful and elegant..."
The Hunka-Hunka-Burning Cheese Pizzaria.... The place looked like a Fiftie's style drive-in, but it had wall-to-wall photoes and murals of 'the King'. There was even a Sistine-Chapel-like ceiling mural of a half-naked Elvis. The place had metal tables and leopard-print chairs. And Elvis music on the jukebox. Only Elvis music. There are many pizza parlors in New York. This one happened to be totally devoted to a man who just happened to share a birthday with our Bowies.

The owner clearly didn't see the humor. A very large (widthwise) man in his mid-sixties with a jet-black pompadour and a rhinestone apron, found that his own cullinary shrine to the King, was now overrun with queens...and a couple of Jacks. And a few straights.

"I'm-a gonna Royal Flush you wierdos outta here if you don't git out!" The owner scowled.

Ricochet, "We want to order 5 pizzas, please. And about 20 sodas."

"Forget it, Pineapple-Head!"

Ricochet fumed, but Liza and Veronica slid up to the counter...

Veronica leaned into the counter, sideways, seductively, "You know, dah-ling, we were just DEVASTATED when we heard the King was gone..."

The owner blushed, smiling, "Not gone, ma'am...not really."

Liza leaned forward, and crossed her arms on the countertop, giving the owner a very nice view of her..."Oh, Liza and I always dreamed of singing back-up with Elvis...As you can clearly see, I'm a BIG fan!" Some parts of her more than others...as the Pizza owner drooled.

Veronica put a slender finger to her red lips, play pouting, "But, if you don't want us around, then..."

Liza pouted a lip, "We could always...move on..." They turn away, then...

The owner sputtered, "L..l..ladies!!! Ladies! Mah apologies!" He puts his arms around each lady's shoulder, "One must show hospitality to his guest, especially where I'm from--in Memphis!"

Ricochet scratches his head, "How do they do it?"

Tin says, "They're called boobs, Ric."

Don't understand me, just love me

Edited by Kristin Machina on 09/28/01 03:30 PM (server time).

Entire thread
Subject  Posted byPosted on
*Splitting Headache (kept)  Kristin Machina05/05/01 01:44 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Part II  Kristin Machina05/06/01 02:01 AM
.* Splitting Headache--Coffee and TV  Kristin Machina05/07/01 02:37 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Coffee and TV  Starbuck05/07/01 11:52 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Transmittion  Kristin Machina05/08/01 00:28 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Magical Beings  Kristin Machina05/10/01 02:20 AM
.*Slaughter in the Air  Kristin Machina05/14/01 01:29 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Incurably Ill  Kristin Machina05/12/01 02:42 AM
.*Splitting Headache--No Control  Kristin Machina05/15/01 03:16 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Steely Resolve  Kristin Machina05/16/01 03:22 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Get Me Out of Here!  Kristin Machina05/22/01 03:51 PM
.*Splitting Headache--Aladdin Sane  Kristin Machina05/20/01 10:56 PM
.*Splitting Headache--Castle Rumble  Kristin Machina05/29/01 06:56 PM
.*Splitting Headache--The Music Outside  Kristin Machina06/01/01 02:20 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Night Flight  Kristin Machina06/06/01 02:01 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Get Me to a Doctor!  Kristin Machina06/12/01 00:58 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Get Me Off the Streets!  Kristin Machina06/20/01 02:19 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Zeroed In  Kristin Machina06/22/01 01:46 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Zeroed In  SugarPlumFairy06/27/01 03:54 AM
.*A Note to My Readers  Kristin Machina06/27/01 03:41 PM
.*hello?  Starbuck08/05/01 01:12 AM
.*Re: hello?  Echoes Of A Fairy08/06/01 09:41 AM
.*Re: hello?  Starbuck08/06/01 03:06 PM
.*Re: hello?  decibel08/06/01 07:00 PM
.*MY MY!  Kristin Machina08/06/01 07:06 PM
.*Re: MY MY!  Starbuck08/06/01 09:04 PM
.*Splitting Headache--Morning Becomes Aladdin  Kristin Machina06/27/01 02:37 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Wake Up, You Sleepy Head...  Kristin Machina08/09/01 04:29 PM
.*Splitting Headache--David Who?  Kristin Machina08/16/01 01:50 AM
.*Splitting Headache--I'll Make You a Deal  Kristin Machina08/30/01 00:47 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Truth Hurts  Kristin Machina09/14/01 08:27 PM
..Splitting Headache--Lunch Break  Kristin Machina09/27/01 11:33 PM
.*Splitting Headache--Lunch Break Part II  Kristin Machina09/28/01 03:21 PM
.*That Crazy Balance of My Mind  Kristin Machina10/23/01 04:06 PM
.*Splitting Headache--Fallen Wings  Kristin Machina10/24/01 03:31 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Underground  Kristin Machina11/16/01 05:01 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Hunger  Kristin Machina11/21/01 01:32 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Busted!  Kristin Machina12/18/01 08:54 AM
.*Splitting Headache--All the Madmen  Kristin Machina01/25/02 02:15 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Kidnapped!  Kristin Machina01/26/02 05:52 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Gang's All Here  Kristin Machina08/14/02 05:41 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Beauty and the Beast  Kristin Machina11/09/02 07:03 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part I  Kristin Machina11/11/02 04:36 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part II  Kristin Machina03/11/03 03:19 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part II(b)  Kristin Machina03/12/03 10:53 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part II(b)  dweny03/16/03 04:18 PM
.*Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion  Kristin Machina03/14/03 08:00 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion II  Kristin Machina03/14/03 08:52 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion III  Kristin Machina07/22/03 01:02 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion III  revidescent07/22/03 06:39 PM
.*Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion IV  Kristin Machina07/22/03 02:11 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion V  Kristin Machina07/30/03 09:45 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Blackout  Kristin Machina08/15/03 04:39 PM
.*Splitting Headache--The Final Confrontation part I  Kristin Machina08/29/03 01:37 AM
.*Splitting Headache--The Final Confrontation II  Kristin Machina09/23/03 10:07 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Ziggy Stardust  Kristin Machina10/05/03 11:00 PM
.*Splitting Headache--Back to Normal?  Kristin Machina11/08/03 02:19 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Finale!  Kristin Machina11/12/03 02:03 AM
.*Before this goes...  Kristin Machina12/30/03 00:20 AM
.*Re: Before this goes...  ziggysgrl01/02/04 01:34 PM
.*Re: Before this goes...  ThomasJNewton601/02/04 04:50 PM
.*Re: Before this goes...  Kristin Machina01/03/04 09:55 AM
.*Re: Before this goes...  ziggysgrl01/04/04 01:43 AM
.*The Spark  Kristin Machina01/05/04 01:14 AM
.*Re: The Spark  ThomasJNewton604/06/04 01:05 PM
.*Re: The Spark  Kristin Machina04/06/04 02:48 AM
.*Re: Before this goes...  ziggysgrl01/02/04 08:36 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Ziggy Stardust  prrrrr10/27/03 03:52 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Ziggy Stardust  White_Owl10/08/03 02:58 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Ziggy Stardust  prrrrr10/07/03 11:46 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Ziggy Stardust  revidescent10/08/03 00:42 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Final Confrontation II  ThomasJNewton609/25/03 09:26 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Final Confrontation part I  revidescent09/01/03 00:07 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Final Confrontation part I  ThomasJNewton608/29/03 05:00 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Blackout  ThomasJNewton608/15/03 06:09 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion V  ThomasJNewton608/09/03 06:18 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion V  revidescent07/30/03 05:50 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion V  ThomasJNewton607/30/03 01:07 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion IV  ThomasJNewton607/25/03 01:47 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion IV  Starbuck07/22/03 12:37 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion II  revidescent03/29/03 00:50 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion II  SugarPlumFairy04/04/03 07:35 PM
.*Much appreciated!  Kristin Machina04/07/03 06:51 PM
.*Re: Much appreciated!  dweny04/14/03 02:06 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion II  abe1182503/18/03 10:17 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Mind-Warp Pavillion II  Starbuck03/15/03 09:35 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part II  Starbuck03/11/03 06:16 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part II  Paddy-chan03/11/03 07:41 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part II  SugarPlumFairy03/11/03 07:45 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Rescue Part I  Starbuck11/20/02 08:48 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Beauty and the Beast  Mousey11/10/02 01:32 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Gang's All Here  xgirl8108/14/02 12:49 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Gang's All Here  decibel08/14/02 05:54 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Gang's All Here  abe1182508/14/02 09:52 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Kidnapped!  abe1182502/18/02 12:09 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Kidnapped!  abe1182503/08/02 01:00 PM
.*Coming soon...  Kristin Machina03/12/02 10:29 PM
.*Re: Coming soon...  abe1182503/13/02 07:04 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Busted!  decibel12/26/01 03:47 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Busted!  abe1182512/21/01 01:26 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Fallen Wings  abe1182510/25/01 08:07 PM
.*Re: That Crazy Balance of My Mind  Starbuck10/24/01 00:49 AM
.*The Family Tree  Kristin Machina10/24/01 01:09 AM
.*Re: The Family Tree  Starbuck10/24/01 10:26 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Lunch Break Part II  abe1182510/01/01 12:18 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Truth Hurts  artist_in_a_tunnel09/15/01 09:48 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--I'll Make You a Deal  Starbuck08/31/01 01:42 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--I'll Make You a Deal  sparkle08/30/01 02:29 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Get Me Off the Streets!  Starbuck06/21/01 01:20 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Get Me to a Doctor!  Starbuck06/15/01 01:17 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Damage Control  Kristin Machina06/13/01 11:48 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Music Outside  Starbuck06/02/01 02:25 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--The Music Outside  SugarPlumFairy06/04/01 07:16 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Castle Rumble  SugarPlumFairy05/30/01 08:25 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Steely Resolve  SugarPlumFairy05/16/01 08:57 AM
.*Oh, my.  Brainfreezy05/07/01 04:19 AM
.*Splitting Headache--Splitting Hairs  Kristin Machina05/07/01 00:58 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache--Part II  Starbuck05/07/01 00:53 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache  Atonalexpress05/06/01 00:59 AM
.*Re: Splitting Headache  marlepluto05/05/01 08:47 PM
.*Re: Splitting Headache  Starbuck05/05/01 08:01 PM
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