"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only trying to retrieve my cairns-terrier Effee,
Dogz told bemused doctors in the Severe Burns Unit of Norfolk Hospital.
.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
. . . . Dogz . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Effee . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Partner_Dave

Notorious asexual Dogz and his homosexual lover Partner_Dave, had been admitted for emergency treatment after a felching
session had gone seriously wrong.

I pushed a cardboard tube up Partner_Dave's rectum and slipped Effee, our cairn-terrier in. He explained.

As usual, Partner_Dave shouted out 'Armageddon', my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve Effee but she wouldn't
come out again, so I peered into the tube and struck a match, thinking the light might attract her.

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described what happened next.

The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a flame shot out of the tubing, igniting Dogz’s hair and severely burning his face.

It also set fire to the Effee’s fur, whiskers and hat which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine,
propelling Effee out like a cannonball.

Dogz suffered second degree burns, a black eye and a broken nose from the impact of the cairns-terrier, while Partner_Dave
suffered first degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

Thankfully Dogz, Partner_Dave and Effee are all on the mend and doctors predict that all 3 will be able to resume
felching within a month.

Edited by infidel on 03/07/08 07:14 AM (server time).