1. when did you realise you were gay/bi?
13. Then maybe a week or two later I realised I wasn't. Damn Bowie for looking so attractive on that Young Americans cover!

2. when you first left your country?
19. Went to Paris to meet my Canadian sweetheart. Boy howdy, what a story.

3. when you got the job u work at now?
Started working with the company at 18, worked my way up to a lower-end managerial position at 20. Currently on a six-month hiatus in Canada, but the job's waiting for me.

4. When did you first catch your parents having sex?
Never. My parents split up when I was still young and my stepdad was such a fat fucker I'm not convinced the physics of the situation would actually permit for that sort of thing.

5. When did you first try an illegal substance?
Started smoking whatever it is you kids call pot nowadays when I was 16. It's been a fun four years.

I could be a genius if I just put my mind to it.