You dumb ass!
1) Incredible that you took the time to write this ridiculous novel. I started to read it, shook my head, paged down, paged down again, that was enough
2) I'm sure that you are the most caring, wonderful person ever and that if the world would only listen to you then everything would be, well, just swell!
3) Let's face it, you are a snivelling wussy child and this post of yours proves that you have a most pathetic life. How embarrassing!
4) I am not nice. Fuck you, how's that!
Edward the Confessor
Richard the Lionheart
Bung the Hole